


A Better Life

by AsheliaB



Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Chickens, Depression, Eventual Happy Ending, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Slice of Life, Slow Burn, Social Anxiety, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Swearing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-29
Updated: 2018-08-23
Packaged: 2018-12-21 05:12:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 28,284
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11937030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AsheliaB/pseuds/AsheliaB
Summary: Anna doesn’t like many people. Shane doesn’t like any people. These two outsiders will find strength in each other and learn how to build a better life together. Plus chickens.





	1. A New Start

Anna sighed contentedly as she sat on the front porch of her new (to her) farmhouse. Almost three weeks into her new life in Stardew Valley and things were coming along quite nicely.

Her two new chickens, Raisin and Maestro, happily clucked away in the fenced-in yard next to the house as they pecked at the ground in search of hidden treasures. They had even begun laying eggs every morning. She would have to look into how to start incubating eggs soon. Mason jars lined every available surface in the kitchen, all in various states of progress as she worked on making jam from all the salmon berries she had foraged over the last week.

Two crows were perched on the roof, watching the activity with interest. When Anna had first pulled into the overgrown lot of her new home, she'd been delighted to see the crows milling about. She had always considered crows to be her spirit animal of sorts. They were ridiculously smart. They weren't too proud to do whatever they had to to get through the day. They were survivors. And Anna's inability to keep even a basic houseplant alive pretty much guaranteed there would be no crops growing on this farm. She rubbed the small pendant that hung from her neck. It was an ornate silver crow's head with jade eyes - one of the few possessions she hadn't sold off before moving. Yes, the crows were more than welcome here.

An excited bark pulled Anna from her musings. She looked up to see a tan cocker spaniel bounding in her general direction.

"Tara! Over here sweetheart!"

The dog slightly adjusted its trajectory and arrived in front of Anna, tail wagging so hard her whole backside wiggled along with it. Anna bent down and scratched Tara's ears as she looked into the dog's cloudy eyes.

"Having fun, honey?"

In response the dog jumped up into her lap and began furiously licking Anna's face.

"I'll take that as a yes," Anna laughed. "Okay, okay, that's enough."

She gently put the dog back on the ground and kissed the top of her head before giving her butt a couple light pats.

"Go. Have fun. Do dog things."

The bushes rustled on the other side of the yard and Tara was off. Anna chuckled as she watched the old dog play. The dear animal couldn't see anything right in front of her face. What little was left of the dog's eyesight seemed to be used solely for catching the slightest movement from far away. Tara had adjusted seamlessly as she lost her sight, her nose, ears and memory filling in the gaps of information her eyes couldn't provide anymore. So much so that by the time Anna had begun to suspect her dear companion was losing her vision, the vet confirmed that the dog was, for all intents and purposes, blind. Still, it certainly hadn't slowed the old dog down. Even moving to the new house had been pretty seamless. After a few days of introducing Tara to the area, now Anna just had to make sure that doors that were normally left open stayed that way and vice versa, that the pillows weren't blocking the spot Tara used to jump onto the couch, that kind of thing.

A dull throbbing near her temple had Anna checking her watch. Almost 10 AM. Three and a half hours since her last cigarette.

The first couple weeks at the farm had been really good for cutting back. She'd been so busy clearing the overgrowth and repairing the old coop next to the house that there hadn't been many opportunities for smoke breaks. Now that things were getting more or less settled, Anna found herself with a bit more free time and was slowly falling right back into old habits. In an attempt to stave off the inevitable she had decided to limit herself to one smoke every four hours.

It had been three and a half hours.

"Fuck it, close enough." Anna muttered as she lit up.

Since Robin and Lewis had welcomed her to the community when she first arrived, no one else had come to introduce themselves and Anna had been too busy to make it into town.

And she was perfectly fine with that. People were a lot of work. She had a switch in her brain, she called it her 'working switch.' When she flipped that switch, she plastered a bright smile on her face and played the social game impeccably. But it was tiring. So tiring. That exhaustion had been the deciding factor in leaving her old life behind. Too many people. The near isolation of her grandfather's old farm had finally become too tempting to ignore. Anything that couldn't fit in her old hatchback was sold off. After leaving an 'I QUIT!' Post-it note on the computer screen in her cubicle and telling the few friends she had about her new and sudden life decision, she and Tara had headed to their new, hopefully serene, life on the farm.

Well _mostly_ no one had come by, and Anna had _mostly_ been too busy to make it into town. She'd had one visitor. The day after calling the neighboring farm and buying two chickens a man had shown up with a chicken under each arm. His unkempt hair and 5 o'clock shadow at 7 in the morning. An old ratty hoodie and old ratty tennis shoes. Shit. He was totally her type.

"Hey," he grunted. He nodded towards her coop. "In there?"

"Oh, yes please. Thank you so much!" She smiled brightly and jogged ahead to hold the gate open for him. Tara came around the corner, butt wiggling, to find out who the new smells belonged to.

After setting the chickens down the man squatted near Tara and held his hand out for her to sniff. He was quickly rewarded with some enthusiastic licks to said hand. He smiled and scratched the top of her head.

Aaand he's an animal lover. Dammit...

Anna had a small, genuine smile on her face as she watched the interaction.

"Her name's Tara," she said. "And I'm Anna."

"Shane." He mumbled, standing up and dusting off his pants. "You know how to take care of chickens? You got food for them? Got the nest box ready?"

He poked his head into the coop to inspect the accommodations before nodding slightly at what he saw.

Her smile faltered.

"Umm, well, yes, I think I do at least. I've been doing some research online and it seems simple enough. I've got a compost box over here for when I clean out their new home. And food. Yes. I bought some feed online and it arrived yesterday. I figured after this I'd probably restock at your farm?"

"Not my farm." Shane grunted. "Just renting a room."

"Oh, sorry, right. Didn't mean to assume. Sorry."

"Whatever." He shrugged. "Don't screw up taking care of the chickens." He paused, "Gotta get to work."

With that he turned and quickly started down the road heading into town.

"Oh," she managed to stutter.

He was already significantly away before she remembered to call out, "Thanks again for the help!"

If he heard her, he didn't acknowledge it.

The next morning she found a well-worn copy of "How to Raise Chickens" in her mailbox.


	2. On the Farm

First things first, Anna thought as she deposited the instructional book on the kitchen table.

She pulled her short brown hair off her face with a hair clip and rolled her jeans up a couple times to keep the hem from dragging on the floor. After slipping on her old hiking boots, the only really sturdy pair of footwear she owned (everything else was either flip flops or cheap work flats), Anna headed outside. Tara followed along happily as Anna opened the gate to the chicken's yard, closing it immediately behind her. Tara whined in protest at being stuck on the other side. A bunny took a few hops in the distance, the movement immediately distracting the dog from her worries. She took a few bounding leaps out in that direction before pausing with one of her front paws raised, eagerly waiting for the next hint of movement. She couldn't quite contain that butt wiggle.

The chickens were already outside, cautiously exploring the new environment.

"Hey you two! How are you liking your new home?" Anna went into the coop, checking the food and water. Everything looked in order, she was pretty sure. Two days ago, with a little bit of online research, she'd thought the whole chicken thing had seemed pretty simple. Shane's line of questioning yesterday may have shaken her confidence a bit.

Still, he had left the birds with her. That must have meant she didn't seem completely incompetent. Though the book he had left her (it must have been him, he was literally the only person she talked to for more than 30 seconds since getting here) clearly indicated he didn't think she was completely competent either...

Anna rolled her eyes and frowned as she headed back to her cabin to retrieve the chicken manual. That damn book frustrated her. One minute she'd get that warm fluffy feeling in the pit of her stomach and a stupid grin on her face as she considered how thoughtful the gift was. The next minute she was filled with righteous, indignant anger at the idea that he didn't think she knew what she was doing.

_Stop over analyzing. He was just being nice._

She shook her head, as if to dispel the warring factions in her mind. She grabbed the book and headed back outside.

"Tara! Here, girl!"

A few moments later a tan blur raced right over to her and immediately rolled over for belly rubs.

"Good girl," Anna murmured as she obliged the request. Tara had always been a happy dog, overwhelming proof that dogs could indeed smile. And she'd somehow grown even more boisterous and joyful since their move to the countryside.

She sat on the bottom step of the front porch, Tara settling in next to her and resting her chin in Anna's lap, and began skimming through the book. The basics were easy enough. Keep the food and water fresh. Keep the coop clean. Keep the coop warm in the winter. She made a mental note to start researching heater options and costs.

The next chapter caught her attention. Chicken treats!

"Oh hell yeah, my babies are getting treats!" She glanced over the list for anything she might already have laying around.

-Oatmeal. Well that was easy enough. She could pick some up the next time she went shopping.

-Melon rinds. A little harder, considering her penchant for frozen pizzas and microwave dinners. But still doable once in a while.

-Grapes/Raisins.

Anna jumped up and dashed into the house, Tara barking excitedly and close on her heels. She grabbed a generic bag of raisins and ran out to the coop.

"All right, first treat of many! Welcome to your new home sweethearts!" She opened the bag and kneeled down She scooped a small handful of raisins, sprinkling them on the ground near her.

One of the hens perked up immediately and came over, happily pecking at one of the rued fruits.

"You like these, huh?" Anna laughed. "Hmmm maybe that's a good idea for your name. Yep. Done. Your name is Raisin!"

She looked over at the other chicken. It was still a few feet away from her. She swore it was holding its nose up at the offered treat.

"Well, aren't you a fancy one. You'll need a fancy name..." Anna pondered over the most pretentious words she knew. "Fine then, Maestro. I promise I'll find something more to your tastes soon."

She sat there for a while, tentatively giving Raisin a few pets before the hen wandered off to continue exploring.

"Right then. Real work time?"

Anna worked into the late afternoon, making a small dent in the abundant weeds and debris that had spent the past decade overtaking the land.

_Holy crap I'm out of shape._

Anna hobbled her way into the house and jumped into the shower to wash off the day's sweat and dirt. She felt much better once she was clean. So much so that she started to seriously consider making that first trip into town. She really should see what all the town offered, maybe pick up some groceries... _and I guess meet some neighbors_... That part didn't seem as appealing.

She scanned the living room and found a dog shaped pile of blankets that was snoring softly. She smiled as she headed out, quietly closing the door to keep from waking Tara.

Once in town Anna looked around curiously. There was a small clinic. Closed. The general good store. Closed. She frowned in confusion and checked her watch.

7:00 and nothing was open.

"Welcome to small town living," she chuckled wryly.

The light tinkling of a piano hit her ears and she looked to her right.

_Heh, of course there's a bar._

Well, she had walked all the way here, she'd be damned if she was just going to turn right back around. She wasn't much of a drinker, but seeing as how it appeared to be the only thing open...to the bar, then!

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took me a lot longer than I thought it would to get to that dang bar. I promise so much sad chicken man angsty fluff next chapter! :)


	3. Beer & Pizza

After a quick smoke to calm her nerves, Anna was ready for people. There was a cheerful rotund man with a bushy mustache behind the bar. She approached the register and gave him a small smile.

"Well, I heard we had a new neighbor! I was beginning to think Lewis made you up!" He guffawed.

"Uh, yeah. Sorry, I've been crazy busy trying to get the farm going a little. I'm Anna."

"Name's Gus, good to finally meet you! Now what can I get ya?"

"The palest ale you have and a pizza of some sort? No vegetables, all the meat?"

"Ha! Can do missy! Em'll bring the pizza out when it's ready." He gestured to blue-haired girl serving drinks at the other end of the bar as he handed her the beverage. "Sit wherever you want!"

"Thanks," She smiled. After assuring Gus she'd just need the one beer for the night, Anna paid up right away in case she felt like a quick exit later. She glanced around for an inconspicuous place to sit.

_Looks like there's no such thing as Thirsty Thursdays around here._

The bar was practically empty. There was a woman sitting by herself at the far end of the bar. From the glazed look in heavily made-up eyes, she'd been here for a while. At the other end of the bar, leaning against the wall, she spotted Shane. His eyes were glued to the full mug in front of him. Her stomach did a little flip and her heart decided to double its speed.

_Seriously, Anna? For the love of Yoba calm the fuck down. Don't be a fucking spaz._

She took a not-at-all calming breath, a decent swig of her beer and headed over to him.

"Shane! Hey!" She smiled brightly once she was in front of him.

He blinked a few times and continued to stare at his beer.

_Walk away Anna._

"I just wanted to thank you again for delivering Raisin and Maestro yesterday. I think they're settling in quite nicely!"

He slowly looked up at her. The look on her face made her think she had possibly grown a set of horns in the past five minutes. Or maybe a second head?

_Stop talking Anna._

"That's what I named them," she laughed nervously for a second. "Raisin and Maestro. I think it suits them."

_Holy crap what are you doing_ _Anna?!_

"Well anyway, I wanted to thank you for lending me that book. I started looking it over earlier today. I think it will be super helpful."

_WALK THE FUCK AWAY ANNA_

"I'll make sure to keep it safe. It's obviously a well-loved book and I -"

He slammed his beer onto the counter next to him, cutting her off mid-sentence.

"Why are you talking to me?" He snapped.

"Sorry." Her whisper was barely audible. "I didn't mean to bother you. Sorry."

She walked away stiffly, face beet red. That quick exit was going to be much quicker than usual. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Em studiously cleaning the same spot on the counter over and over.

_Fucking_ _awesome._

"Um excuse me," Anna's voice cracked and she cleared her throat. "Em, right? Do you think I could get that pizza to go?"

"Emily or Em is fine, and yes, yes of course! Can do!" She seemed to be a bit embarrassed at likely having been caught eavesdropping.

"Thanks." Anna saw a lone booth near the entrance and slumped into it, making herself as small as possible. Her throat burned from holding back tears.

_You do not cry in public. You do not cry in public._

She concentrated on a small tear in the seat across from her, concentrated on slowly breathing in and out, until a shallow square box appeared on the table in front of her.

"Hey listen, don't mind Shane," Emily said softly. "He's just-"

"No, yeah it's fine. My fault."

"But-"

"No, really. It's fine. Excuse me."

Anna grabbed the pizza and hastily rushed out the door, leaving a frowning Emily in her wake.

The tears started falling once she hit the road leading out of town towards her home.

_This is why you don't fucking do this shit Anna. What the hell is wrong with you?_

As soon as she was home she closed the door behind her and slid down the wall. She sobbed loudly once, hands pushing hard against her forehead, eyes wide open and unblinking. Tara came out from behind the couch, blanket trailing behind her as it slowly fell off her backside. She began noisily sniffing and pawing at the forgotten pizza box next to Anna.

"For Yoba's sake Tara can you give me five fucking minutes?!"

Anna angrily grabbed the pizza, stomped across the kitchen and shoved the uneaten food into the fridge.

She ignored the innocent whining at her feet and collapsed into her bed. She ignored the slight weight that leaned itself against her back a few moments later. She ignored the bark for attention. She ignored the excessive licking alternating between the back of her neck and upper arm. And she cried herself to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I say angsty fluff? I meant angst. Just the angst. 
> 
> Bonus: familial obligations may slow my updates over the weekend... 
> 
> :-D


	4. A Plan

With a night's sleep between her and the events at the saloon, Anna felt a little better. But not great. After giving Tara some belly rub apologies and checking in on the chickens, she grabbed her axe and headed towards the giant woodpile she had been accumulating since she started clearing the land.

She set the first log onto the splitting stump and lined up the axe.

_CRACK!_

_What were you thinking? You talk to a guy for two minutes and you think you're best friends or something? Learn to read a damned social cue for once in your life!_

Ten minutes into berating herself and the tone of her inner monologue started to change.

_What the hell did I do wrong? Greet an acquaintance? So yeah, maybe I rambled a bit..._

Another ten minutes.

_No, you know what? Any decent human being would have carried the other half of that conversation. At the very least they wouldn't have been a complete jackass at someone just trying to be friendly!_

Ten more minutes.

_Who the hell does that asshole think he is? Too good to say 'hi, you're welcome, glad it helped?' Fuck him._

_And why do I care so much?_

She dropped the axe at her feet and collapsed, exhausted to the ground.

"Fuck I'm out of shape."

After a midday shower, the best course of action seemed to be to go to the bar again that night and completely ignore Shane, proving that she was unaffected by his jackassery. And she had to look cute while doing it, of course. Not too cute though. She had to use the old tried and true I-just-happen-to-look-great-but-I-wasn't-trying-or-anything cute.

As Anna walked down the dirt road towards town that evening, she still had most of the confidence she had found earlier. She wore her favorite pair of jeans. They were well worn, with only a few holes. One of her gaming t-shirts with a distressed logo over the chest. This one was from her favorite space shooter/alien dating sim. Over that she put on her grey sleeveless hoodie - completely impractical but Yoba she loved that thing.

Once in town, outside the saloon, her 'Go to the bar and ignore Shane' plan started to seem a little short-sighted, particularly given it was a Friday night. Even just through the windows she could see there were significantly more people in there than there had been the previous night. She decided to sit on a bench she'd spotted a bit away and have a smoke to calm her nerves.

Which unfortunately never seemed to be as effective as the alcohol that was so close and yet so far inside the saloon.

She was lighting her third cigarette when loud footsteps caused her to look up.

"Hey! New girl, right? I'm Sam!"

Before her stood a young man. Man? Kid? Anyone younger than 25 looked like they were teenagers to her. He had big, spiky blonde hair. The only thing bigger than his hair was the boisterous smile plastered on his face.

"Umm, yes. Anna." She moved slightly so he wouldn't be downwind of her smoke.

"Awesome to finally meet you!" He took her free hand and vigorously shook it. "Was beginning to think you were a ghost or something. Or maybe a hermit!" He laughed.

"Oh. Well, there's a lot to do on the farm. Trying to get it up and running and all. Not starving to death kinda takes top priority right now..."

"Ha!" He clapped her on the back enthusiastically. "You're funny. Dark funny. You should meet Seb, you guys would get along! You coming in for a drink? We always play pool in the back. Do you play? You should come hang out! It'd be fun!"

That was a lot of words in a very little amount of time.

"Uh, yeah. I think so. In a little bit."

"Cool, great! I'll see you on the inside!" He waved goodbye as he jogged the short distance to the bar.

Well that settled it. Back the farm. Now. She picked up the cigarette butts at her feet and hurried away.

<><><>

Inside the saloon, Shane sat in his spot, staring at his drink. The door opened and his eyes flicked to the doorway in spite of himself.

Sam.

His eyes drifted back to his beer.

"Hey guys! Guess who I just ran into!" Sam's voice drifted through the air from the adjacent gaming room. "The new farmer!"

Shane's ears perked up and he rested his head on one of his hands to disguise that he had turned his head to try to listen better.

"Yeah she's right outside! I invited her to come hang with us!"

The other two's voices didn't carry as well as Sam's.

"She seemed cool enough. Kinda quiet. A little weird. Pretty cute. I think you'd like her Seb!"

Shane turned his attention back to his beer; he didn't need to hear any more.


	5. Leaks

Anna woke the next morning to the sound of steady rain. She smiled. Rain was the best weather. Quiet and calming. Tara disagreed however. When Anna let her outside the poor dog did her business as fast as possible before dashing back inside to the protection of the blanket pile.

"Right. Have fun there." She chuckled as she headed out to check on her feathered charges.

The two chickens clucked away happily inside the coop.

"Hey you two, keeping dry?" She asked as she refreshed their food and water. And then she heard it.

Drip..drip..drip

"Oh, come on, you've got to be kidding me!"

She followed the noise of dripping water and found a four perfect circles in the roof leading outside. Probably left over from the old rusted weathervane that she remembered used to be on the coop.

"Right. Well you guys hang tight over there on the dry side. I'll see what we've got to fix this mess." She jogged to the old shed behind the main house. There were a lot of old tools in there, boards, plenty of cans of random who-knew-what...maybe there'd be something in there that could help. She propped the door open for light and inspected the shelves.

Scanning through the various cans of paint, solvents and cleaners she spotted a promising can labeled 'Wet Patch Roof Cement.' She turned the can over and quickly skimmed the directions.

"Hmm does any thing around here look like fabric patch? What the crap is fabric patch?" She muttered to herself as she searched through the shelves.

She had half crawled inside one of the lower shelves when someone cleared their throat behind her.

"Aaah!" Anna jumped, smacking the back of her head on the shelf and then falling on her ass. Looking up she saw-

"Shane?"

At least he had the decency to look sheepish.

"Hey," he mumbled from the doorway, seemingly frozen in place, likely from the ridiculous debacle he had just witnessed.

"Hey," she got up and rubbed the back of her head. She frowned in physical pain and mental frustration. "What are you doing here?"

"First rain since the coop got fixed up. Wanted to make sure it was good."

Pride warred Need. Need won.

"Yeah not so much actually. There're some drill holes or something leaking from the roof. I found this can of roof cement I was hoping would help. It's got some scary looking instructions on it though."

She held out the can. He finally broke out of his paralysis and took a few steps into the room, taking the offered can.

"Should work," he grunted. He handed it back to her and then started rummaging through the shelves, placing more items in her hand. A trowel, a wire brush, some weird wire mesh square things. He grabbed the ladder that was shoved in the back corner and headed out. Anna followed, shutting the door behind her.

Shane leaned the ladder against the side of the coop and pulled his hoodie up over his head to try to guard from the rain.

"Over here." She showed him and he set the ladder up, shaking it a couple times to make sure it was stable. After climbing up to the roof he leaned back over and reached a hand out to her. She handed him the supplies one at a time and once her hands were free she joined Shane on the roof.

She quickly located the holes from this side and pointed them out.

"Fixable?" She asked hopefully.

Shane grunted affirmatively and set to work cleaning the area off with the wire brush.

They worked in silence together in a comfortable silence over the next hour or so. Well mostly Shane worked. Anna watched, handing him the supplies as he needed them. He didn't really need her help but she couldn't bring herself to leave him alone in the rain while he worked on her coop.

Finally Shane grunted again. "This should hold through the storm at least."

They climbed back down. Anna returned the supplies to the shed while Shane peeked into the coop. When she joined him he was cleaning up the last of the wet hay so she grabbed some fresh hay out of the hopper to lay down.

"Once the rain passes and you can let the chickens out, we'll seal up the inside too, just to be safe." He glanced over at the two cuddling hens and smiled slightly. "Looks like they're settling in well."

Anna smiled, "Yeah, I think we're getting along nicely."

She stepped towards the chickens. Raisin perked up at her approach and clucked happily as Anna scratched the hen's head.

"Which one's which?" Shane was right next to her.

"Raisin here's the friendly one. Maestro's a bit more aloof. But it's all an act." She reached over to pet the other chicken. Maestro looked the other way but scootched a bit closer. "See?"

"They're happy." Shane said softly, giving Raisin a few pats.

They stood there together a few minutes watching the animals until Anna shivered and let out a loud sneeze.

"Shit, we're soaked. C'mon." She tugged on Shane's arm and headed to the house. "I at least owe you lunch. And dry clothes. And a ride home. And probably a couple beers."

"Do I have to do all the other things to get to the beer part?"

Anna grinned at him.

"Yes." 


	6. Filling Silence

Shane followed Anna to the main house. Once inside he stood in the doorway, unsure of what to do next.

"I'll be right back. I'll find something for you to change into."

He raised an eyebrow doubtfully but didn't say anything. Anna went to her bedroom and began rummaging through her dresser. After a few minutes she returned, smiling apologetically.

"No judging." She smirked as she handed a small pile of clothes over to him. "Bathroom's just down the hall on the right. Just leave the wet clothes in there and I'll grab them. Oh!"

She dashed down said hallway.

Shane looked down at the clothes in his hands. Teal sweatpants covered in little fluffy sheep. A large sleep shirt that had a cartoon bear wearing a sleeping cap, with the words 'I'm Bearly Awake' scrawled across it. And...wow...a pair of men's underwear; they were a ridiculous bright purple and absolutely littered with pictures of bananas. He was holding them up in disbelief when Anna reappeared with a fluffy towel in her arms.

"Feel free to take a shower while you're in there too. Or at least here's a towel to help dry off." She looked up. And immediately turned beet red. "Hey I said no judging! They're brand new, no one else has worn them."

"That doesn't answer any of my questions." He deadpanned.

"Fair enough," she grimaced and sighed. "Back home, one of my friends would throw a, he called it 'The Grease of the Winter Star' party every year. He thought he was so witty... Anyway, everyone would bring a wrapped gag gift, we'd get drunk and then pull names out of a hat. When your name was called you went up and picked a present. That wonderful specimen you're holding is my winnings from two or three years ago, I think?"

"So you've just held onto this hideous thing all this time?"

"I figured some day I'd need it. And here we are!" She finished proudly.

"Huh." He paused for a moment, then shrugged and headed for the bathroom to rinse off and change.

She took the opportunity to get changed herself, opting for black leggings and a long flannel shirt. She had just turned the oven on to start preheating when Shane emerged.

"Oh perfect, I'll get the laundry going. Is pizza ok? Hope so; that's pretty much all I've got. They're in the freezer if you wanna grab one."

Shane opened the freezer door. It was glorious. Half the space was stocked top to bottom with frozen pizzas, the other half had a 20 lb bag of ice. An impatient yip drew his attention to his feet. Tara sat there, looking up at him, her bottom half wiggling with barely contained excitement.

"Oh!" Anna called out. "Freezer door opens, Tara gets an ice cube. It's a thing."

With a small smile, he procured an ice cube and held it out. Tara continued to sit, staring up in his direction.

"Well, you want this or not?" Tara barked once, stamping her front paws in front of her.

"Oh, sorry, I forgot," Anna grimaced apologetically as she returned. "She's blind. And ice doesn't smell like anything, so you gotta hold it pretty close to her mouth. She won't bite or anything."

Shane grunted and kneeled down to the dog's level, holding the ice cube directly under her snout. Tara daintily took the cube, then dashed off to the living room to enjoy her treat.

"She always been blind? I couldn't even tell."

"Hmm, not always. At least a year now though. I don't know how long she was able to hide it from me before I figured it out. It's amazing how much she can use her nose and ears to compensate."

Shane grunted in agreement, grabbed the top pizza -pepperoni- and closed the freezer.

Anna took the pizza from his hands and actually looked at him for the first time since they'd gotten into the house. Her eyes widened slightly and her jaw may have slackened a bit.

"Sorry, I just realized how amazing you look right now..."

"If you breathe a word of this to anyone-" The phrase 'If looks could kill' had never been more appropriate than in this moment.

"I swear I will take your secret to my grave. Besides, you're the only person I talk to."

"You talk to Sam." The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. He stared, dumbfounded, at the air in front of his mouth. If he could escape right now he would, but he was trapped here for at least another hour by the fuzzy sheep dotted across his pants.

Her eyebrows raised in surprise and she looked at him in stunned silence for a moment.

"Sam?"

"Forget it. Shouldn't have said anything. I'm a fucking idiot."

"No, it's just - " It hit her. "Loud blonde kid?"

He smirked slightly at her description and nodded. "He made it sound like you guys hit it off? He was pretty disappointed when you didn't show."

"Oh Yoba," she groaned and began to busy herself by getting the pizza ready. "I ran into him outside the saloon last night. He was nice, I guess. And loud. And overwhelming. And - Wait, he _told_ you that?"

"His, uh, voice kinda carries..."

Anna started to feel light-headed, her heart beating rapidly. She slumped into one of the kitchen chairs and pressed a hand to her forehead, trying to will herself to calm down.

"Hey, uh, you ok? Look, it's not a big deal. Don't know why I even said anything."

"No, 's my fault. Just give me a minute. I don't, ummm, handle," she paused to take a steadying breath. "attention very well."

He snorted at the gross understatement and she smiled at his response to her ridiculous explanation. The oven beeped.

"Could you -" Anna gestured vaguely.

"Yeah, sure." He popped the pizza in and set the timer. Not knowing what else to do, he took a seat at the table and stared at the floor. "Look, I'm a fucking jackass. I say stupid shit. Doesn't mean anything."

She shook her head. "You haven't done anything wrong. Glad you told me. Least now I know I can't go to the one bar in town ever again."

"Just Fridays, really. Other days are safe, usually."

"Yeah?"

He shrugged. "Worse comes to worse, sit by me, they'll all avoid you."

She smiled, "Okay."

They sat in an odd silence, not quite awkward and not quite comfortable.

"Hey, Shane?"

He glanced over at her.

"Listen, I'm sorry about the other night, at the saloon. I ramble when I get nervous and I realize now I pretty much did to you what that Sam guy did to me. I'm pretty dumb sometimes."

He shook his head and frowned, "I'm just an asshole. Don't gotta apologize to me."

"You're a good person, Shane."

He opened his mouth to protest but she cut him off.

"Or we're both assholes. Or we're both stupid. Whatever, doesn't matter. I'm just trying to say, next time, I'll do better."

He shrugged awkwardly and resumed staring at the floor. She fiddled with the buttons on the cuff of her shirt.

The silence that settled over them was slightly more comfortable as they waited for the oven to finish cooking their meal.

 


	7. Berries & Beer

A rooster's call woke Anna the next morning. That was new. Were wild roosters a thing? She'd have to ask Shane the next time he was in a talking mood.

Anna smiled as she thought about the previous day's events. After lunch and clean clothes, she had dropped Shane off at the neighboring ranch with the promise of beer once the weather cleared. She was looking forward to it.

After finishing the morning chores, she decided to explore her land a bit more. It didn't take long to come across a patch of bushes covered in little red berries. They kind of looked like raspberries but not quite. Anna snapped a photo with her phone and hopped onto the internet for a quick image search.

Salmon berries. Definitely edible.

She popped one into her mouth. Not bad. With a bit of sugar, they'd probably make a decent jam.

Grinning, Anna jogged back to the house and grabbed a couple empty ice cream pails from a cupboard. Tara trotted over to investigate what the commotion was all about.

"C'mon girl! Berry picking time!"

With an affirmative bark, the dog chased after Anna as she raced back outside to start foraging. Even when she lived in the city, Anna would often head out to the countryside in search of wild berries that she would turn into jam to use as gifts for her coworkers. Tara always came with her and would spend the majority of the day searching the underbrush for frogs while Anna filled her plastic pails with fruit. Today was no exception. And her one-time hobby would likely be her only income until the hens started producing eggs. She had plenty of jars to at least get started canning.

When the sun started to set, she was dirty and sweaty. Her arms and hands were full of small scratches from digging through the bushes. And she had two full pails of berries and a happy but exhausted dog to show for her efforts. All in all, it had been a successful day.

She checked in on the chickens on her way back and sprinkled a handful of the berries on the ground for them. Raisin clearly thought this was the best thing she had ever done. Maestro couldn't be bothered to care.

"I will find your weakness yet, my lovely." She laughed and scratched the top of the grumpy chicken's head.

Inside the house, Anna stored the berries in the fridge and took a quick shower to wash off the day's work. After slipping into an old comfy pair of jeans, tank top and light hoodie, she headed into town.

When she arrived in the town square, she passed Mayor Lewis and gave him a nod.

"Hmmm, I wonder if anyone's birthday is coming up. I should check the calendar on the community billboard and find out..." he muttered loudly to himself as he walked by.

_Wow, passive aggressive much?_

She wasn't even aware of such a board. Glancing around, she saw said board on the outside of the general goods store. She had indeed missed the mayor's birthday. And someone named Vincent as well. And today was Haley's birthday. She had no clue who that was.

Anna had never been good with birthdays. She gave gifts to friends when she found something she thought they would like, but usually missed their actual birthdays. She always figured the giving was more important than the day and her close friends had grown used to it over the years. Most treated her with the same courtesy.

However...Shane's birthday was coming up next Saturday. At the very least she could buy him a beer. Anything more than that would probably just freak him out anyways.

_At least his birthday's not on a Friday. Thank Yoba for small blessings I guess._

She made a quick note in her phone to make sure she didn't forget, then headed to the saloon.

Shane was sitting in the same spot he had been last time she was at the bar. She gave him a small smile and walked up to Gus at the bar.

"Evening, Anna! How's the farm coming along?" He grinned.

"Pretty well so far, I guess. Things are coming together I think, all things considered."

"Well, that's great to hear! What have you got planted? Nothing better than fresh vegetables!"

"Planted? Oh, ummm, nothing actually. I've never been good at keeping plants alive. I've mostly been working on the coop and taking care of my chickens."

"Oh," he seemed disappointed, but his smile quickly returned. "Well then, what can I get you tonight?"

"Uh, one of those 4-meat pizzas, a pale ale, and ummm one of whatever Shane's drinking." She could feel the blush creeping up her neck as she said that last request.

"Sure thing." Gus raised an eyebrow but didn't make any other comment while he poured the alcohol. "Here ya go. Em'll bring out the pizza when it's ready."

"Thanks." She grabbed the mugs and made her way to Shane. She set his mug in front of him and sat in the neighboring empty seat. "Hey."

He glanced at her before returning his eyes to his beer. "Hey."

There were a few people scattered around the room. The same blonde woman that had been here last time was saddled up to the bar. There was a thin man with glasses and a brown mustache sitting near the middle of the bar. Two older gentlemen sat a table across the room and there were a couple women sitting alone at some tables in the far corner. Just as Shane had promised, there seemed to be an invisible bubble around his table. No one walked near them, or even glanced their way, except for Emily refilling Shane's drink. Anna paid for his next drink and then figured they were even for the coop repair. Small town beer was expensive...

Anna and Shane sat in companionable silence for the next 20 minutes. When the pizza arrived he looked over at her with a raised eyebrow. She shrugged in answer.

"Have some. I'd never be able to eat the damn thing on my own."

"Thanks." He grunted.

"Yep." She grabbed a piece for herself.

After they were done eating, Anna finished the beer she had been nursing all night and gave Shane a wave goodbye as she headed back outside.

The next week, Anna fell into a routine of checking in on Raisin and Maestro before foraging berries all day, trying to take as much advantage of the season as she could. The two hens had begun laying eggs and she stored them in the door of the fridge until she could figure out what the next step was. Her fridge was also becoming stuffed with salmon berries and Anna had to transfer the berries to various bowls and Tupperware to keep enough pails free to keep picking the fruit. She was going to have to look into bulk sugar prices and probably get some more mason jars. A lot more mason jars.

Every night she headed into town and had a beer while sitting next to Shane. They'd greet each other and grunt goodbyes, but other than that they would sit in silence. It was the most relaxing week Anna had had in a long time.

This evening, however, her heart was racing no matter how many times she told herself to calm the fuck down. She was getting ready to trek the now familiar route into town.

Tonight was Shane's birthday. And she was _**not**_ going to be weird about it.


	8. Happy Birthday, Shane

Shane was sitting in his usual spot when Anna arrived at the saloon. He glanced up when she came through the door and gave her a slight nod before returning to his beer. Anna smiled.

_See, he cares. He just sucks at showing it._

She ordered two beers, setting one in front of Shane as she took her place next to him.

“Everyone deserves a birthday beer, right?” She grinned when he looked at her in surprise.

“I...thanks.”

“Any time. Or once a year really.” She chuckled as she took a sip of her own drink.

She settled into silence next to him. He sat stiffly and it almost seemed like he had more to say and was trying to figure out how to say it. She had learned over the last few weeks that pushing didn’t help. When he was ready to say something, he would.

In the meantime, she opened her phone and started looking at incubators. With the hens laying several eggs a day and that random rooster she had heard but hadn’t caught a glimpse of, it seemed like a good idea to start expanding her little farm.

Incubators were fairly inexpensive, it turned out. A bit more complicated than anticipated, though.

_Air circulation? Temperature control? Manual or automatic turner? I have to turn the eggs? Oh Yoba that sounds terrifying._

“Marnie sells incubators.” Shane grunted.

“Oh, perfect, that makes it easier. This is kinda overwhelming. Do you know what any of this jargon means?” She gestured at the features list on her screen.

He leaned closer and took the phone from her hands.

“Some of this automatic stuff is nice, but some of it’s kinda sketchy. The temperature and that kind of stuff, as long as you keep an eye on it and make sure the machine’s working, you should be fine. I don’t trust those auto turners though. Better to do it yourself.”

He pointed out the various features to her as he explained.

“You have to turn the eggs.” She kept most of the trepidation out of her voice.

“Heh. Yeah. It’s not as scary as it sounds. You put an ‘x’ on one side of the egg to help keep track. And you gotta flip ‘em, like, three or four times a day. And keep track of how long they’ve been in there. Stop turning them on day 18. They’ll hatch a couple days later.”

“Wow, you really know a lot about this stuff!”

“I guess,” he shrugged, a blush creeping up his neck. “It’s not a big deal.”

“Well, I think it’s cool.” She bumped her shoulder against his. “Do you work with the chickens at Marnie’s?”

“In my free time, yeah. But I work at Joja during the day.”

“No shit, there’s a fucking JojaMart here?”

“You really need to get out more, you know?” He smirked. “But yeah there is. It’s a shit job but I need the money.”

“Yeah, I know how crappy that place is. I worked for corporate before I moved here.”

“Seriously? You don’t seem like you’d be one of those assholes.”

“Ha, well I was one of those assholes for quite a few years.” She smiled sheepishly. “Really though, I was just a lowly peon in advertising.”

“You were the one making those shitty flyers?” He laughed. “That’s amazing!”

“Hey!” She frowned. “I was one one of, like, 40 people who were kept on a very tight leash and stifled from all creativity. That place is really good at crushing your soul.”

“Yeah it is. Place is a shithole. I fucking hate it.”

Anna raised her mug towards Shane.

“Fuck that place.”

He returned the gesture, clinking his mug against hers. “Fuck that place.”

They finished their drinks in silence. Shane motioned at Emily for another round, which was quickly delivered. After a few more minutes passed, he turned back to Anna.

“How’d you do it?”

“Hmm?”

“How’d you get out?”

“I was lucky this land was in the family for me to fall back on. Otherwise I’d still be there, I’m sure. But, yeah, I guess one day I got sick of crying myself to sleep every night.” She frowned. “Fuck that place. I need a smoke. Be right back.”

He nodded. “I’ll drink your beer if you’re gone too long.”

She let out a surprised laugh. “Yes, sir.”

She hurried through her smoke outside, the nicotine calming her back down.

It’s his birthday. No more depressing talk.

When she went back inside he had another full beer.

“All right,” she said. “Less Joja, more beer.”

“I’ll drink to that.”

They drank until last call. Anna steered the conversation back to the earlier incubator discussion. The chicken-related talk drew them both out of the funk that Joja had put them in. By the end of the night Anna was giggling as she tried to think of egg puns while Shane tried his hardest to maintain a straight face.

“All right you two. Time to head home.” Gus called out as he cleaned the counter.

Anna looked up. They were indeed the last ones in the bar.

“C’mon Shane, lets get the _shell_ out of here.”

Shane let out a bark of laughter before catching himself. “Not funny.”

“Whatever, I’m hilarious and you know it.”

“Sure, that’s the word.”

Once outside they paused.

“Tonight was fun.” Anna mumbled as she gave him a drunken hug.

“Yeah.” Shane returned the embrace for a moment before letting go.

“Have a good night, Shane.” She turned to head home.

“Hey, Anna?” He was so quiet she almost didn’t hear him.

“Yeah?”

“Thanks. For tonight.” He shoved his hands in his pockets as he talked to his feet. “Didn’t think I’d have a good birthday, but I did.”

“Any time. Really.”

He nodded, then turned around abruptly and began walking away.

She watched his figure disappear into the night before heading home.

_Happy birthday, Shane._


	9. The Dock

The hangover she woke up with the next morning reminded Anna why she had stopped drinking so heavily. After popping a couple ibuprofens and having a morning cigarette, she sluggishly saw to the morning chores. Even moving slowly, she was finished up at 8 am. She wanted to swing by the general store to pick up canning supplies but it wasn’t open for another hour.

_I’ll be damned if I give another cent to JojaMart...if I can help it..._

She spent the next hour preparing a good chunk of her foraged berries and sterilizing the jars she did have so that when she got back she’d be able to get right starting the jam. The trip into town was uneventful. Anna was pretty sure she made Pierre’s day - his eyes lit up when she approached the register with a cart full of sugar, lemon juice and his entire stock of mason jars. He’d given her a five percent discount for buying so much and in return she promised him a couple free jars of jam once they were ready.

He hadn’t even made any passive aggressive comments about this being their first time meeting despite the fact that she had moved into town nearly three weeks ago.

_It’s the little things that can really make you warm up to a person..._

It was mid afternoon by the time her first batch of salmon berry jam was cooling. With all of the windows and even the door propped open, the canning process had still made the house unbearably hot. Still she’d accomplished a lot and was excited that she would soon actually have product to place in the selling bin outside her house that the mayor had showed him on her first day.

She was equally excited for her nightly trip to the saloon. She knew she liked Shane way more than she should have, given how little she actually knew about him, but her stomach still twisted in knots every time she thought about him. Actually being in his presence had the opposite effect. She’d sink into their companionable silence and the day’s stress would melt away.

And after last night she was pretty sure she could at least consider him a friend.

Anna gazed out at the land past her house. She hadn’t really made much headway beyond the immediate area. She knew Shane lived to the south, and the times he had come to visit he must had to trudge through a good amount of weeds and underbrush to get to her. Not to mention that incubator she would be ordering soon.

She really should clear a walking path at the very least.

_Well, let’s keep that productivity going, then._

She grabbed the old scythe from the shed and headed out. It wasn’t perfect, but Anna managed to cut a path from one end of her land to the other.

_  
I could probably break down some of these damn stones laying around everywhere and make a nice gravel path once canning season is done._

No longer preoccupied with physical labor, she became acutely aware the it was most definitely, very much nighttime.

“Fuck, I’m late!”

There was nothing Anna hated worse than being late. Even if it was only for made up deadlines she had in her head. The quickest route into town was probably through the neighboring ranch so she set the scythe down at the edge of her property and hurried forward.

She had only taken a few steps when she noticed a familiar figure a little ways ahead of her, sitting on the dock of a small lake.

Shane was staring at her and when she made eye contact he raised the can of beer in his hand as a greeting. He turned back around to face the water as she made her way over to him.

“Hey,” she sat down next to him, feet dangling off the pier but not quite reaching the water.

“Hey,” he grunted.

He was looking more disheveled than usual, his eyes couldn’t quite focus and he swayed a little even in his seated position.

Has he been drinking all day?

“Is this ok?” She asked hesitantly. “I don’t want to bother you.”

“‘s fine. You don’t bother me.” He mumbled before reaching into the 12-pack at his side and handing her a can.

She took a small sip and sighed. Definitely not ready for Round Two.

“Wuss,” Shane snorted as he slammed the remainder of his own drink before immediately cracking open another one.

“Whatever,” She retorted. “I don’t know how the fuck you’re going at it so strong again after last night. I still need some recovery time.”

He shrugged. “Practice makes perfect.”

They fell into a silence for a bit as Anna nursed her beer and Shane continued pounding them away.

“I have a goddaughter.”

“Hmmm?” Anna looked over at him. He was staring at the drink in his hands. “I have a godson. My little sister’s kid.”

“No. Like, she’s mine. Got custody. My fucking responsibility.”

“Oh.” She let the implications of that wash over her. “Damn. What’s her name.”

“Jas. Eight years old. She’s a cute little shit.” He sighed as he took another drink. “She deserves better than me.”

Anna shook her head. “Shane-“

“No. Fucking look at me. 32 fucking years old and I’m a goddamned stock boy.” He crushed the can in his hands and angrily threw it behind him. “Fuck.”

His voice broke as he swore.

“It just feels like no matter what I do nothing’s going to change. She’d be better off without a worthless fuck-up like me taking care of her.”

Tears began to fall unbidden from his eyes and he hunched over himself as he tried to keep the sobs from racking his body.

Tentatively, Anna touched his back. He stiffened momentarily before collapsing into her lap. She rubbed his back with one hand while her mind raced for any words that could help.

When he quieted down she spoke softly.

“Do you know much about crows?”

“Stupid shitty birds everyone hates?”

She chuckled. “A lot of people think that way. That’s just because they don’t understand. But crows don’t give a shit what people think about them. They’re super smart - they have accents depending on where they’re from and they know how to use simple tools.”

“If they’re so smart why are they digging around in the garbage all the time?”

“They’re survivors. They do whatever they have to to get to the next day. And if that means digging through garbages or eating fucking roadkill, they don’t care. They’re not too proud to do whatever it takes.”

His arms tightened around her as she continued. She held him close with one arm and began softly stroking his hair. She was crying now too and her throat hurt from the overwhelming emotions.

She whispered fiercely. “So what if you’re a goddamned stock boy. That’s what you _do_ ; it’s not who you _are_. Who you are is a good man who works hard every fucking day to provide for his little girl. There’s no shame in that. I don’t know much of anything but I do know you’re not a fuck-up. You’re a good person surviving in a shitty world and you’re going to do whatever it takes to get to the next day.”

They sat like that for a while until Shane let out a shuddering sigh and pulled himself out of her embrace. He looked exhausted.

“C’mon, let’s get you home.” She stood up and helped him to his feet.

“Yeah, Okay.”

She guided him the short walk to his home. Between the alcohol and the late hour, he was in a daze. She helped him with his keys and got him inside.

“I got it from here.” He nodded to himself and stumbled further into the house. Anna left quietly, returning to the dock to clean up the mess of discarded cans before heading home. She was asleep the moment her head hit her pillow.


	10. Awkward Conversations

Early the next morning Anna was working in her coop when there was a tentative knock at the door.

“Come in,” she called.

The door opened and she saw a familiar face peering in.

“Shane! Hey!” She beamed.

“Hey,” he scratched the back of his neck for a moment and frowned.

Anna let him stand there for a few seconds, then grabbed him by the arm and pulled him inside. She led him to the wall and gently pushed him into a sitting position. Turning, she picked up Raisin and plopped the hen into his lap.

She settled down next to him as he began absent-mindedly scratching the chicken on the head and waited for him to speak.

A few more minutes passed before he cleared his throat.

“Sorry ‘bout last night.” He stared into his lap.

“Why sorry?”

She glanced over. He concentrated on the happy chicken in his lap.

“I dunno,” he shrugged. “I was drunk. I said a bunch of stupid shit you didn’t need to hear...”

Anna frowned. “You didn’t say anything stupid last night.”

“I said a lot of stupid shit last night.” He laughed in a huff.

“Bullshit. You were just being human last night. Besides, we're friends, right? If you can't be human with your friends, then when can you?”

Shane shrugged noncommittally, “I guess.”

“I mean I basically had a panic attack the first time we hung out and you didn't judge me.” She paused as her stomach dropped. “Oh, Yoba, I mean I thought - I didn't freak you out too badly then, did I? It seemed like you didn't-”

“Nah,” he interjected quickly. “I get that shit. You don't have to worry about it.”

“Well, I get your shit too. So you don't have to worry either. We're cool.” Anna smiled reassuringly.

“Cool.” Shane nodded to himself as he continued to stroke Raisin’s back.

It wasn’t long before the watch on his wrist began beeping insistently.

“Time for work?” Anna asked and lifted the hen from his lap.

“Yeah.” He grumbled as he stood up and brushed the dirt off his pants. “Fuck Mondays.”

“Try not to have too much fun without me.”

“Heh, yeah right,” he smirked slightly as he headed to the door. “See ya tonight.”

The last sentence was halfway between a statement and a question. Either way he didn’t wait for an answer and began a brisk walk towards town.

Anna sighed as she set Raisin on the ground. Maestro looked up at her expectantly, just out of arm's reach.

“I have a thing for the complicated guys.” She explained.

The grumpy chicken clucked once before turning its attention pecking at the ground.

“And grumpy hens, apparently.” She muttered as she propped the door open and headed back to the cabin.

Most of the day was spent canning, with copious chicken breaks. And copious dog breaks. And maybe a few smoke breaks. By mid-afternoon yesterday’s batch was cooled and ready to go. Except for how boring the jars looked.

_Time to put those marketing skills to use._

Anna booted up her laptop, opened the Illustrator program as well as a tab to her favorite stock image site. A few hours later she had a simple label she was satisfied with. Across the top it read “Crow’s Nest Farm” in Optima, because, really, screw serif fonts. “JAM” was bold and large across the middle, in a deep salmon color, then “Salmonberry” below that in the same color and smaller. A simple black crow outline trailed up the left side of the piece.

“Well, Tara,” she smiled at the dog laying at her feet, who wagged her tail rapidly in response. “I think we’ve got ourselves a brand!”

<><><><>

Shane was already in their typical spot when Anna got to the saloon. She gave him a small nod then approached the bar and ordered her usual ale.

“Coming right up!” Emily began filling the mug. She smiled brightly at Anna while they were waiting. “So, will we see you at the Flower Dance?”

“The what now?”

“The Flower Dance! Everyone in town goes! There's food, drinks, dancing… it's great!”

“Ummm, Maybe?”

“Great! I can't wait to see you there!” Emily grinned enthusiastically as she passed the drink over.

Anna rushed to her seat next to Shane and sighed as she sat down. “Seriously, where does she get all that energy from?”

“Well, you see, _‘normal’_ people actually like being around lots of people, bright lights, loud noises, yadda yadda..” Shane waved his hand as he trailed off and took a big swig from his mug.

“Ummm, no. That doesn't sound right. My money’s on black magic.”

“Heh. You've been talking too much with that creepy wizard guy.”

“Shut up!” Anna laughed and bumped her shoulder against his.

“Honest to Yoba. He's got a big tower in the middle of the forest and everything. You can see it from the dock.”

“Uh-huh. And I bet he's got a big wizard beard and big wizard robes with a big wizard hood.”

“He wears a cowboy hat, but otherwise, yeah. Pretty much.”

“You are so full of shit and I need a lot more to drink before you've even got a chance of making me fall for this.”

“I seriously hope I'm there the first time you see this guy.” He downed the rest of his beer and motioned with the empty mug towards Emily, who nodded and began filling another glass.

“Hmph. Next you're going go tell me there's a grizzled old warrior living in the mountains.” Anna rolled her eyes and chuckled.

“Okay, I'm pretty sure _you're_ the one fucking with _me_ now. Less talk. More drink.”

As if on cue a fresh mug was placed in front of him, which he promptly downed.

After a bit of less talking and more drinking, Anna tapped Shane's shoulder to get his attention. “What's the deal with this Flower Dance thing that's apparently happening soon?”

“Some town tradition shit or something. Marnie says the whole town shuts down for the day and everything. Hell, even JojaMart gave us all the day off. Unpaid, of course, but whatever.”

“Are you going, then?” _And can I stick close by so everyone else leaves me alone?_

“Yeah. I promised Jas I'd take her. She's been going on about it for weeks. I guess there’s a competition for Flower Queen she thinks she’ll win. I’m pretty sure she’s too young and don’t know how to tell her. Kid’s got a hard enough life. She doesn’t need more disappointment.” He frowned. “At least Gus is making all the food so that should be good.”

“Hmmm,” Anna grimaced. “Well, if she ever needs cheering up Tara’s been looking for a new friend to play tag with. She’s really good around kids. Doesn’t help with the whole Flower Queen thing, but maybe it can give her something to look forward to?”

“I dunno - she’s pretty shy around new people. The dog might help though. We’ll see.”

“Yeah, I get that. Still, it’s a standing offer. Hell, she can come pull weeds all day if that’s her thing.”

“Heh, she probably would enjoy that, actually.” He smiled softly at the beer in his hands.

“Consider her hired then.” Anna chuckled. A yawn escaped mouth and she glanced at the clock on the wall. “Crap, I should really get home. Have a good night, Shane.”

She gave him a pat on the head and he gave her a lazy wave farewell. On her way home she made sure to take a look at the community calendar.

_Shit, the Flower Dance is on Wednesday?! Stupid small towns and their inconveniently placed festivals... Guess I’m shopping tomorrow._

 

 


	11. Shopping Trip

Anna quickly moved through her morning chores, with Tara following closely at her heels. Once the chickens were fed and pampered, she knelt down and scratched vigorously behind Tara’s ear. The dog closed her eyes and leaned into the touch.

“I'll be gone most of the day so you're in charge, okay good girl?” Anna kissed the dog’s forehead. “Keep the chickens safe.”

She gave the animal a loving pat on the butt and retrieved her purse from the house. After double checking for her wallet, keys and phone she hopped in her little hatchback and headed out.

Thanks to the lack of traffic in the early morning hour, the drive to the big city was swift. Most businesses were just hitting their opening times when she hit the familiar off ramp that led downtown.

It took almost as long to navigate the city streets and find a parking spot as it had to make the drive in the first place.

_Okay, this I definitely do not miss._

Her first stop was a printing supply shop. She picked up extra ink for her personal printer and spent far too long debating between the different blank label options. After dropping off her supplies in her vehicle and adding a few more coins to the parking meter she checked her phone.

Almost 10 am. She scrolled through her limited contacts and sent a quick text to her best friend, Eliza.

_‘I’m in town. Shopping & Lunch?’_

She had barely hit the send button when the phone buzzed.

_‘Holy shit, you’re alive! It’s a miracle! Praise be to Yoba!’_

_‘Yeah, yeah can you get out of work?’_

_‘Oh no, I think I'm about to get a horrible migraine that prevents me from being a productive employee.’_

_‘Coffee, half hour?’_

_‘You know it!’_

Their favorite coffee shop was just down the street, leaving Anna with a little time to kill. She meandered in that direction, looking into the store windows as she passed.

A chalkboard sign was propped up next to one of the doors. It read, _“The Shed Grand Opening! 50% Off Your First Purchase!”_

A tiny bell announced her arrival when she opened the door. And paradise greeted her. Wooden ladders repurposed into shelves, old milk pails turned into stools and flower pots. All the kitschy things she loved that would be so easy to make but she would never get around to it. One of the walls had several shelves littered with knick knacks. A little metal chicken grabbed her eye. It was composed of wires of various gauges, nuts, bolts and small gears, and the wings appeared to be repurposed spoons.

“Yeah, you’re coming with me, buddy,” she mumbled as she picked it up and headed to the register.

Soon enough she had claimed a table at the cafe. She spent the time sipping on her iced coffee and and browsing a couple random webpages on incubators.

“Holy crap you are tan!” A familiar voice enthused and Eliza plopped down in the chair across from Anna.

“Ha, I think I've gotten more sun this past month than I had the past few years combined.” Anna grinned.

“Well it looks good on you! I never knew you had so many freckles! So tell me everything, Miss Farmer!”

“Oh, well. I've got 2 chickens now. And I've been doing a lot of canning from the wild berries on my land. And, yeah. That's, umm, about it so far.” She shrugged. “Hopefully I'll have more chickens soon. They're adorable.”

“Instead of the crazy cat lady I always thought you'd become, you're gonna be a crazy chicken lady instead?”

“Ah yes. I'd almost forgotten how clever you are,” Anna deadpanned.

“So, have you even met anyone yet or are you being a big ol’ hermit as usual?”

“Hey, I've met a couple people!” she protested. “My neighbor, Shane, has been helping me get the coop fixed up and stuff. He really knows a lot about chickens.”

Just mentioning his name caused a slow blush to start creeping up from her neck. This did not go unnoticed.

“Shane, huh? Is he a big strapping farmer boy? Overalls and a piece of hay permanently sticking out of his mouth?” Eliza smirked.

Anna crumpled a napkin and threw it at her friend. And missed. Horribly.

She sighed and got up to pick the offending piece of garbage off the floor. Sitting back down she glared halfheartedly.

“Just a normal guy with normal clothes and a normal job in town.”

“Uh-huh…” Eliza looked at her expectantly.

“He's been by my place a couple times to help out but most nights I just see him down at the bar.”

“I'm sorry did you just tell me that you go to the bar most nights?”

Anna's entire face felt like it was on fire at this point. “Well, it's a small town. There's not much else to do.”

“And when you lived in the big town with all the things to do you would usually stay home alone and play video games.” Eliza looked over and decided to take pity on her. “New topic: what are we shopping for?”

“Oh! Well I just found out there's a town festival tomorrow so I need to get a dress.”

“You. A dress. Okay, who are you and what have you done with my best friend? I've known you for over 10 years and have seen you in a dress once. When I married Ryan. And you were grumpy about that for weeks before and after.”

If her hair could blush it would be beet red right now. “On second thought, I think I can handle this on my own.”

“Oh, Anna come on, I'm sorry. I'll tone it down, I promise! Please?”

“Fine. But that was all three of your strikes.” Anna sighed. After a few moments passed she gave a small smile. “He is so stupid cute though…”

Lunch and shopping was filled gossip and giggling. Eliza had Anna recount every interaction she’d had with Shane and proceeded to over analyze everything. The only thing Anna left out was that night on the docks - that was private.

As for the dress, they settled on a simple off-the-shoulder blue dress with a skirt that hit just above her knees. Eliza thought the skirt was too long and Anna thought it was too short so this was as close to a compromise as they would get. It also came with a thick leather belt that cinched at the waist and both girls agreed that part was just the right amount of flair for Anna.

In the clearance bin by the register, Anna spotted a headband decorated with white cloth flowers and a few plastic gems. It was so cheap it was almost free, so she threw that in when she bought the dress.

“Umm, hon, I don’t think that matches?” Eliza raised an eyebrow at the strange purchase.

“It’s not for me and thank you for your confidence in my ability to dress myself.” Anna laughed.

It was mid-evening by the time Anna got home. She checked in on the coop and then collapsed into bed with Tara snuggled in at her side.

“How is shopping more tiring than farming?” She yawned as she dragged one of the blankets over herself. She was asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.

 


	12. The Flower Dance, part 1

The next morning Anna followed the hand-painted signs and brightly colored pennants that marked the path to the Flower Dance. Lively music wafted through the air as she got closer. Pierre had a small stand set up at the entrance of the clearing. She gave him a quick smile and wave, and headed in.

_You can do this Anna. It’s just a whole day with a crowd of people. You’re a grown adult and this is a normal thing that you can do._

A quick scan of the area revealed Shane standing near the buffet table. It was the first time she’d seen him out of his usual hoodie - instead he wore a nice pair of jeans with a button up shirt. He was even clean shaven. He glanced over at her, his eyes widening slightly. Then he quickly looked away and focused on the plate of food in his hands.

_Is he blushing? Ok, this dress was worth it just for that!_

She had taken about two steps in his direction when a soft hand grabbed hers. Startled, she whipped her head to the right and saw Emily's beaming face.

“Anna! Hi! I'm so glad you made it!” She grinned. “Come on, let me introduce you to some of the others!”

Before Anna could respond Emily was tugging her towards the riverside where two people, a man and a woman, were standing.

“Leah, Elliott! This is Anna, the new farmer!”

“Ah, I'd heard we had a new resident. It's a pleasure to meet you. I am Elliott.” The man extended his hand in greeting. He had the most luxurious blonde locks Anna had ever seen. Dressed in a red jacket and green cravat, he looked like he had come straight off an historical romance novel cover.

Anna reached out and shook his hand. “Nice to meet you too.”

“And I'm Leah, obviously.” The woman standing next to him smiled warmly. Her strawberry blonde hair was tied in a loose braid and she wore a simple green dress. “I'm in the cabin just south of Marnie, so that makes us neighbors.”

“I see, well it's nice to meet you. Sorry I'm kind of a hermit.” Anna smiled apologetically.

“Oh, no worries. I'm much the same. I spend most days inside working on my sculptures.”

“Oh what medium do you prefer?” Art was one of the few things she could actually talk about easily.

They spent what Anna deemed to be a reasonable amount of time discussing wood carving and found object before she excused herself.

She beelined to the food table and grabbed a bottle of water from a large metal bucket at the side. Shaking the excess ice off the outside of the bottle, she sighed dramatically as she took her place next to Shane.

“Making friends?” He smirked.

“I think I've reached my daily limit for social interactions.”

“It's not even 10 in the morning yet. And you’ve talked to two people.” He gave a small huff of laughter.

“Emily makes it three people, thank you very much.”

Anna looked around and spotted a tree stump a few feet away. She walked over to it and sat down. Shane followed and stood next to her. She took a few drinks of water as Shane picked at the food on his plate. Neither said anything as they both surveyed the crowd. There were several small groups of people scattered throughout the area, what appeared to be different groups of friends all keeping to themselves.

“Hey, who's the guy with the eye patch and cape?” Anna nodded in the direction where the strange character stood.

“That would be the grizzled old warrior who lives in the mountains we were talking about before. His name's Marlon.”

“Holy shit, I don't even know how to respond to that!” Anna laughed. “This town is...unique.”

“Uncle Shane!”

Anna turned just in time to see a little girl with poofy black hair and a poofy pink dress run up and latch onto Shane's leg.

“What's up kiddo? Having fun?” He reached down to give her a pat on the head.

“Yep! Me and Vincent are practicing for the dance! He's not very good.” She giggled happily until she saw Anna looking her way. With a small gasp she tried to hide herself behind Shane.

“Jas, this is Anna. She’s nice, I promise.”

“Hello Jas, it’s very nice to meet you.” Anna said as the girl peeked out at her. “Your dress is really pretty.”

The little girl smiled shyly, still clinging to Shane’s leg.

“Thank you. Your dress is pretty too.” Jas spoke so softly that Anna had to lean in a little closer to hear her. “Uncle Shane, I’m going to play with Vincent some more okay?”

“Sure thing, kiddo. Have fun.”

“Okay, she’s adorable.” Anna smiled as the girl ran off.

“Yeah…”

Anna looked up to see Shane frowning.

“Shane?” Anna stood up and touched his arm hesitantly.

“Nothing. Just my stupid brain.” He shrugged dismissively.

“Attention, can I have everyone's attention please?” Mayor Lewis’ voice echoed through the clearing. “It's time for all the young singles to come over here and line up. Come on, pair up! Don't be shy!”

“What the hell is going on?” Anna's stomach immediately clenched and she looked at Shane with panicked eyes.

“Shit, I think Marnie mentioned something about this. A singles dance or something.” He mumbled and took a few steps back away from the opening.

“Alright, that means you two!” A middle-aged woman suddenly appeared in front of the pair, grinning mischievously as she grabbed Anna's water and Shane's plate.

“Marnie, this is ridiculous. I'm not-”

“Nonsense! It's tradition!” With a stern look Marnie unceremoniously shoved the two onto the dance floor.

A light buzzing immediately began in Anna's ears and the world began spinning.

“Shane, I can't do this. There's people everywhere. I don't-”

“Hey, hey.” He firmly gripped one of her hands. “Anna look at me.”

Wild eyes met calm ones.

“It's just me here. Fuck everyone else. Just look at me. And ummm breathe.”

“Right,” she huffed a small laugh. “Breathing. Yeah. Okay.”

Her death grip on his hand lessened slightly though her heart was still racing. He gave her hand a quick squeeze and took a quick glance at the other couples. He placed her free hand on his shoulder and settled his own hand at her hip, imitating the others around them. As Anna began to calm down slightly, she became aware of just how sweaty Shane’s palm in her hand was.

“Shane?” She whispered.

“Yeah?”

“Are you nervous?”

“Yeah.”

“Thank you.” Anna smiled, his admission somehow giving her a sliver of confidence. Until she remembered - “Also you should probably know, I can’t dance.”

“Heh. Me neither.”

“Oh good.”

The music started. He swallowed quickly and tightened his grip on her waist.

“All right, let’s do this.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact - I had Shane at 6 hearts before the first Flower Dance. He might be my favorite...


	13. The Flower Dance, part 2

“Okay, just keep looking at me. No one else is here.” Shane whispered. “In five minutes we get beer.”

Anna chuckled. “Good motivational speech.” 

It was a disaster. Their steps were clumsy and they stepped on each other’s feet more often than not. Anna hit her forehead on Shane's chin when she tried to look down at their feet. He stepped on her foot and she somehow managed to step on his other one when she tried to disengage.   

The sixth time they stumbled she hissed a quiet “Fuck me” under her breath.

“Gotta buy me a drink first.” 

“Heh.” She giggled before she could help herself and rested her forehead on his shoulder.

“Uncle Shane, Miss Anna, watch us!”

Jas came to their side with a little boy in tow.

“It's easy. You go this way and then turn here. And then the boy spins the girl!”

The children danced with excited over exaggerated movements, totally out of sync with the music.

Shane and Anna looked at each other, shrugged and began imitating the motions of the dance. It was a lot easier once they stopped paying attention to their feet.  

As the song ended, Jas had one more instruction.

“Now the boy does a bow and the girl does a curtsey.” She daintily lifted the hem of her dress, crossed her feet and bent her knees slightly as Vincent basically folded himself in half at the waist. 

Chuckling, Anna followed suit and looked up at Shane as he placed a hand behind his back and bowed deeply.

“How was that kiddo?”

“Perfect!” Jas squealed. “You're a lot better at that than Vincent!”

“Hey!” The little boy pouted. “Sam says I'm real good at bowing!”

Anna laughed and knelt down next to the boy. “Well I think you did very well. And you’re both very good dancers. You helped us a lot!” 

Both Jas and Vincent beamed at the praise.

“Okay, we’re going to dance more now!” Jas grabbed Vincent’s hand and they began spinning each other in circles.

“Come on,” Shane helped Anna stand back up. “We deserve alcohol after that bullshit.”

Using a hand at the small of her back he steered her back to the edge near the refreshments. They settled into the background, each with a drink in hand. Anna leaned into Shane’s side.

“That was fun, but I really hope we don’t have to do that again any time soon.”

“That could have gone a lot worse, but, yeah, agreed on the whole not doing it again part. Uh, no offense.”

Anna snorted and took a long drink. “Absolutely none taken.”

After a while Lewis tapped on his microphone again.

“All right, is everyone having a good time? It’s time to announce this year’s Flower Queen!” He held up a gold tiara. Anna was too far away to see it well, but it looked like it had several jeweled flowers lining it. “It was a tough choice and there were a lot of great candidates! I’d like to thank everyone for participating. Aaaand the winner is…Haley!”

The beautiful blonde woman who had already been standing next to Lewis let out an exaggerated gasp of surprise. She bent her head slightly to allow the mayor to place the crown on her head, then leaned into the mic in his hands.

“Thank you all so much for this honor. It really means the world to me that you have, once again, chosen me to represent this fine city.”

Anna started to zone out as Haley extolled the virtues of the town and how she would not let them down after they had bestowed such a great responsibility on her.

“Ah, shit,” Shane mumbled in frustration.

Anna followed his gaze and saw Jas sitting on the ground with a very concerned looking Vincent standing next to her. The poor girl was trying not to cry and she was failing miserably.

Shane started to head towards them but Anna quickly grabbed his arm.

“Hey, wait a second. I think I might have something that will help.” She reached into her satchel and pulled out the plastic flower crown she had bought the day before. She put it in his hands and then gave him a small push back towards the kids.

He looked down at the headband she had given him. “Worth a shot at least.”

Anna watched him jog over and sit down next to his goddaughter, who immediately climbed into his lap and hid her face in his chest. He sat with her for a little bit, rubbing her back and whispering in her ear. She nodded along dejectedly with whatever he was saying to her, then suddenly perked up. She twisted around to see what he was holding. Her eyes widened with surprised delight and she nearly knocked Shane over when she turned back around to give him a big hug. He laughed and patted her on the head. He said something else to her, and she jumped out of his lap and waited expectantly. He stood up and delicately placed the plastic crown on her head.

 “That was a very sweet thing you did there.”

 “Hmm?”

 Anna turned to see Marnie standing next to her, eyes shining with unshed tears.

 “Oh, it’s nothing, really.” Anna shrugged. “It’s hard to be a kid sometimes. So many emotions and no way not to feel them all. It’s harder than grown ups give them credit for, I think.”

 “Well, I appreciate what you did there. And I know Shane does too.” The older woman’s eyes suddenly glinted mischievously. “Speaking of Shane, I can’t help but notice the two of you have been spending an awful lot of time together?”

 Anna gulped. “Umm, sure I guess. I mean he’s been really helpful with some things at the farm and he’s a really good guy.”

 “I don’t think there’s many in this town who would use those words to describe him,” Marnie chuckled softly.

Anna frowned and straightened her back. “Well maybe they just haven’t taken the time to actually get to know him.” 

“I’ll agree with you there, dear. Shane’s a good boy and I love my nephew, I truly do. He just has some...rough edges that scare people away. Anyways, I’m just trying to say I’m really glad you’re his friend is all.”

“I’m glad too.” _How do I steer this awkward conversation somewhere else?!_ “So, um, Shane mentioned I should talk to you about incubators? Do you have time to get together sometime soon?” 

“Of course, dear! Come on down to the ranch any day. I always welcome company!” 

“Perfect, I’ll visit soon then.” 

Shane came walking up them with Jas settled on his hip.

“Aunt Marnie, Miss Anna! Look at my crown! Isn’t it beautiful?”

“You look wonderful, sweetheart.” Marnie beamed.

“Just like princess.” Anna added.

The little girl smiled widely and loudly whispered to Shane, “I’m a princess!”

“See, I told you.” Shane told Jas. He looked at the two women. “I think we’re gonna call it a day. We’ve had about as much excitement as we can handle.” 

“Yeah, it’s been pretty exhausting. I’m thinking I might take a nap myself soon.” Anna said this partly for Jas’s benefit and partly because it was the truth.

Shortly after Shane and Jas left, Anna quietly exited the dance as well and headed home. It was late afternoon at this point so after doing a quick chicken check, she printed off the jam labels and began putting them on the jars. She then packed them up into the cardboard flats the jars had originally come in. She set two aside to give to Pierre and another two for Shane (because who was she kidding).

She checked the time and was surprised to see it was almost 11pm. 

_Oh jeez how did that happen? Ok, quick smoke, get the jam in the sellbox and get the hell to bed!_

She opened the front door, headed down the steps and almost bumped into Shane. He was sitting on the stairs, looking up at the night sky. At his feet lay a half empty 12-pack case. Several empty cans were scattered at his feet.

“Hey,” she murmured, and sat next to him. He didn’t acknowledge that he heard her.

Sighing she took out her pack and lit a cigarette.

“You should quit smoking.” 

“You should quit drinking.” She retorted.

“Whatever.” He drained the can in his hand, crushed it and let it drop to the ground as he grabbed a new one. 

He took another drink and sighed. “She really likes that tiara. Fell asleep with the damn thing on.” 

“I’m glad it made her feel better.” Anna smiled. 

“Why did you even have that thing with you?” 

“I dunno,” Anna shrugged. “I was out shopping and it was cheap so I grabbed it. I didn’t really put much thought into it at the time, but it turned out to be a lucky buy.”

“So your dumb fucking luck is better than me trying my damndest.”

“What? No. That’s not what I said.” 

Shane rubbed a hand roughly across his face.

“Right. Now I’m just a dumb fuck who can’t understand simple fucking English.” 

Shane stood up and stumbled a couple steps away. Anna reached out to help but he batted her hand away. 

“I don’t need your fucking help!” He yelled as he put more distance between them.

“I know that. Doesn’t mean I don’t want to still. Shane, what happened? Today was a good day.” 

“Today was a good day till I fucked it up you mean.” He scoffed. 

“That’s not what I said, stop putting words in my mouth!” 

As she raised her voice Shane sneered triumphantly.

“There it is. See? Everything I touch turns to shit.” he held his arms out and flourished a clumsy, drunken bow. “I. Am. A. Fuck Up.” 

He turned to leave so Anna tried one more time.

“Shane, wait-”

“Stop wasting your time.” He stumbled as quickly as he could down the southern path. “And don’t fucking follow me!”  

Anna numbly watched him disappear into the darkness. 

_What the fuck just happened?_

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can’t figure out how to put a hyperlink to my tumblr account on here. Might be because I’m on a tablet? My account over there is ashe-lnsk and I’ve been doodling Shane and Anna. :)


	14. Rainy Day

“Stubborn _ass_ ,” Anna muttered to herself as she loaded the back of her car with all of the preserves. She had completely forgotten about them last night after...yeah… So she figured it was worth a shot to see how many Pierre would buy off her.

To make matters worse, it had started raining some time in the early morning and it didn’t look like it would be stopping any time soon. Normally she loved rainy days but today its entire purpose seemed to be making things worse.

The bottoms of her jeans were already sopping wet as was the hoodie she wore. The cardboard from the abandoned case of beer was soaked through and when she had tried to pick it up the damn thing had practically melted under her touch. She put the few remaining full cans in her fridge, considering that payment for the previous night’s headache, and tossed the empties into the recycling bin. The cardboard would either wash away or she’d have to wait for it to dry out to be able to get rid of it.

“Hi, I'm Shane and I don't like _feelings_.” Anna tried to mimic his gravelly voice but ended up sounding more like Batman than anything. She sighed in defeat.

She couldn’t bring herself to actually be mad at Shane. Oh, she was frustrated as hell at him, and pissed off to no end at the current situation, but she also knew that whatever the fuck had happened last night wasn’t because of anything she'd done or because of Jas’s new crown, at least not really. No, whatever that had been ran far deeper. And at least for now, there was not a damn thing she could do about it. Her impotence in the whole matter was easily the most frustrating aspect of the whole ordeal. If she tried to help or pushed him at all it would only make things worse. Her only course of action was to pretend it hadn’t happened and carry on as normal.

_Easier said than done._

She slammed the car’s back door shut harder than necessary and drove into town.

“Anna, welcome!” Pierre called out brightly as she entered the shop and attempted to shake off the worst of the wet. “What can I do for you today?”

“Well, first off, these are for you.” Anna placed a small paper bag on the counter. “Salmonberry jam, fresh off the farm!”

“Excellent, I’ve been looking forward to this!” He grinned as he took a peek inside. “Thank you!”

“I don’t suppose you’d be interested in buying the rest for your store?” Anna hesitantly asked.

“I was hoping you’d say something like that, actually! I would love to expand my selection of local products; it might just give me an edge against Joja!”

“Now that’s an attitude I can get behind.” She laughed.

They worked out the details for what she had in her car and Pierre helped her bring everything in. She promised he would get first dibs on anything produced on her farm and they shook hands.

“Oh, one more thing before you go,” he leaned over conspiratorially, “I couldn't help but notice at the dance yesterday that you're becoming...quite close with one of our townspeople...”

_Oh sweet Yoba save me now._

“Umm…”

“Well I just wanted to make sure you know that I offer a wide variety of bouquets and flower arrangements for anyone who may want to...confess their intentions towards a certain bachelor.” He motioned to a small cooler near the register.

_YOBA WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME_

“Oh, uh, thank you for letting me know.” Anna choked out. “I'll definitely, um, keep that in mind. Anyways I should really get going. I'll see you soon, Pierre.”

She half ran outside and lifted her face to the rain, hoping it would help cool off the fiery blush she was sure was raging on her cheeks. Reaching into her purse for her smokes, she noticed a young man, dressed all in black and holding an umbrella, inspecting the back of her vehicle.

“Um, hi can I help you?” She called out cautiously as she walked over.

“Oh, sorry.” He glanced down at her.

“I think I saw you at the Flower Dance yesterday? I’m Anna.”

“I figured. I’m Sebastian. I wasn’t trying to be a creep or anything, I just saw your bumper sticker. You play Solarian Chronicles?”

“Holy crap, I wasn’t expecting to run into anyone around here who played! I had a group back in the city, but I haven’t had the time since moving.”

“Why anyone would choose to leave ZuZu for this backwards place is beyond me.” He shook his head in disbelief.

“Well, there’s a lot less people here. That’s nice.” She offered.

“You know, that’s probably the only thing you could’ve said that I’d agree with.” He chuckled. “Hey, I’ll let you get back to your day. But if you ever have time to play, we could use a healer.”

Anna scrunched her face. “Everyone always needs a healer. Come back when you need a rogue.”

“Heh, fair enough.”

They stood awkwardly for a couple seconds and then Sebastian abruptly turned away and headed south without another word.

The next stop on her list was Marnie’s ranch. She brought her last two of jars of jam with her, figuring it would be less awkward to gift them to the family as a whole. The two women spent some time looking through one of Marnie’s catalogs, discussing the pros and cons of several models before finding one they both agreed would work well at Anna’s budding farm. Marnie helped her place the order and the machine would be delivered to her home within the week.

When Anna tried to take her leave, Marnie insisted she stay for lunch. Anna got the feeling the older woman didn’t get too many visitors.

It was mid afternoon by the time Anna gratefully arrived back home. She threw her hoodie into the dryer and collapsed on her couch. Tara immediately jumped into her lap, eager for cuddles.

“Hi baby, how’s your day been?” She murmured as she absentmindedly scratched the dog’s ears. She draped a blanket over the two of them and snuggled closer as her eyelids grew heavier. “Just need five minutes…”

A loud crash of thunder and the resulting frightened howl it drew from Tara shocked Anna from her nap.

“Ah shit, Tara, you’re fine,” Anna  grumbled as she tried to reassure the terrified pup. “When has the lightning ever actually gotten you, huh?”

Another flash of light and the following boom sent the poor dog running to the bedroom to hide under the bed. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes, Anna checked the time on her phone.

Almost 7pm. Part of her really just wanted to climb into bed and sleep the rest of the day away, but she knew she needed to make an appearance at the saloon. She needed to show Shane that he hadn’t scared her off, that she was just as stubborn as he was.

Of course, that plan only worked if he actually showed up to the bar too. And he didn’t. Anna couldn’t bear the sympathetic glances Emily kept sending her way for very long. Almost as soon as she had arrived, she headed back out, leaving her beer untouched at the counter.

_Okay, maybe I’m a little mad at him now…_

Once home she funneled her anger into cleaning. She folded all the blankets strewn around the living room. She washed the dishes. She cleaned the toilet. She was halfway through hand washing the kitchen floor when her phone started buzzing. Glancing over she saw that it was just past 11. And Marnie was calling?

She quickly dried her hands on a towel and answered.

“Anna! I’m so sorry to be calling so late, dear, but by any chance is Shane with you?”

“Hey Marnie, don’t worry about it. And no, actually I haven’t seen him all day.” Anna tried to keep the annoyance out of her voice. Why was today the day everyone suddenly decided that the two of them were a thing?

“Oh, ok then I’m sorry to have bothered you. Have a good night dear.” Marnie’s voice wavered slightly.

“Marnie, what’s going on?” Anna could already feel a small ball of fear forming in her stomach.

“Oh, I’m sure it’s nothing dear, it’s just Shane never came home from work today. And he’s not at Gus’s. And now he’s not at your place either. I don’t know where else he could be. I can’t leave Jas alone at the house and, dear Yoba, I don’t know what to do.” The panic in her voice grew as she spoke and she broke into a quiet sob at the end.

“Ok,” Anna swallowed thickly and tried to keep her voice as level as possible. “It’s going to be ok, I promise. I’m sure he’s just fine. You stay home with Jas and I’ll go see if I can find him. And then I’ll call you soon once I’ve figured out where he’s gotten himself to.”

“I can’t thank you enough, Anna. I know I’m probably overreacting; Shane says I’m always doing that. But he’s never not come home before and I can’t stop thinking of all the horrible things that could have happened.” Her voice continued to tremble.

“It’s okay, really. But I need to let you go now so I can go find him, all right?” Anna zipped up her hoodie and started tying her boots back on with shaking hands.

“Yes, yes, thank you. Be safe.”

“Okay, Marnie. You hang tight, I’ll talk to you soon.”

She hung up and did a quick, panicked scan of the room for anything that she might need before heading out. Her heart was beating so hard it felt like it would burst out of her chest. She grabbed a couple blankets and a flashlight. Then paused at the fridge briefly before snatching the list of emergency numbers she kept pinned there.

_I better not need any of these._

  
  
  



	15. Dark Thoughts

This was not how she had wanted to get a full tour of the town.

Shane wasn’t at the dock. He wasn’t down at the beach, or the library, or the bathhouse. He wasn’t at the park or the old abandoned community center.

“FUCK!” Anna slammed her fists on the steering wheel. Her throat was already raw from holding back panicked tears and the half pack of smokes she had gone through in the past hour. She stared blankly ahead, breathing heavily through her nose, as she fought to compose herself.

“Okay, Anna, stop fucking overreacting. A grown fucking man changes up his routine for one day and you're acting like the damned world is coming to an end. You're going to find him, he's going to be fine, and you are going to look like a fucking crazy person when you do if you don't get your shit together. Yoba, you're acting like he's gonna throw himself off a cliff or something!”

A picture immediately formed in her mind of the tall cliffs overlooking the ocean that she had seen from the beach. Drawing a mental map of the town, she figured they were roughly south of Marnie’s ranch. She was pretty sure there was an old dirt road that left the ranch in that direction.

She put the car back in drive and headed back through town.

_It's fine. Just gonna make sure._

The old county road was barely wide enough for one vehicle. She turned on her brights and drove at a snail's pace, scanning the shoulders for anything out of place.

 _You know, like a dead body_.

“Yoba, Anna! Stop with that shit!” she angrily chastised herself.

A little bit of silver flashed in the headlights and Anna slowed to a stop, pulling over as far as she could on the side of the road. She turned on her hazards, slung the blanket bag over her shoulder _(just in case)_ , stuffed the emergency list in her back pocket _(to be safe)_ and grabbed the flashlight.

As she got closer she found empty beer cans. A lot of them. Some had been there long enough for the forest to have reclaimed them; half buried in dirt and leaves. Others were much more recent.

There was a well worn path leading away from the road. It looked like it had been created simply from regular use, all trampled grass and bent branches. It sloped upwards slightly and there would be a random can littered here and there as she made her way forward.

The rain had made the ground slick and Anna slipped more than once. She was a mess of mud and grass stains by the time the path leveled out and opened up again. She was close enough to the ocean now that she could hear the waves crashing.

She swept the flashlight back and forth. Then she saw him, lying face down in the grass a hundred feet or so in front of her.

“Shane?” She called out softly.

No response.

A large amount of empty cans were littered around the area along with a few bottles of what she assumed used to be filled with something harder.

_Hopefully this isn’t all from tonight._

Once she got closer - _Yoba that’s a lot of vomit_ \- she could see his chest slowly rising and falling. She closed her eyes for a moment and released the breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding.

See? Just passed out. Way to panic for nothing.

She skirted around the mess and knelt down on the side his face wasn’t facing. She shook his shoulder lightly.

“Hey, Shane.”

Nothing.

She shook him roughly. And louder - “Shane, C’mon!”

“Buh?”

“That’s what I like to hear.” Anna laughed, only slightly hysterically. “All right, you’re alive and you made a noise. Let’s get you you away from the puke.”

She looped her arms under his and pulled. And moved him maybe an inch.

“You gotta work with me here, buddy.” She dug her heels into the soft earth and used that little purchase to yank again. Better.

After a few more good pulls Anna set him back down. She knelt in front of him and shook his shoulder again.

“C’mon, this isn’t funny anymore. Wake up!” With each word she shook him again, rougher and rougher each time.

“Whu-?” His eyelids fluttered for a moment then squeezed shut.

“Nope. You’re waking up right now!” She slapped him. _Holy fuck I just slapped him!_ It worked. His eyes shot open.

“What the fuck-“ His voice was so slurred she could barely understand him.

“I need your help, ok?” She spoke calmly and slowly. “We’re going to sit up now, ok Shane?”

“Anna?” His eyes half-focused on her.

“Yep, it’s me. I’m going to help you up and then you’re going to stay that way. And then you’re gonna sit with me, ok?”

He looked confused, but nodded. She hauled him up into a sitting position and finally got a good look at him.

He looked like shit. His dark hair was somehow both plastered to his face and sticking out in every direction. His face, his hair, his sweatshirt were smeared puke and dirt.

“We’re going to clean you up, ok? But I need you talk to me while we do that.” She took off her own hoodie and used it to wipe the vomit off his face with shaking hands.

“You’re mad.”

“I’m not mad. I’m scared.” She turned the hoodie inside out and moved on to his hair.

He shook his head stubbornly. “You hate me.”

“I don’t hate you, Shane.” She sighed as she balled up the soiled garment and tossed it behind her. Then she started unzipping his hoodie. “Can you lift your arm for me?”

“You _should_ hate me.” He let her move his arms one at a time as she stripped the sweatshirt off him and chucked that to the side as well.

“Well I don’t. Stay right there ok? I’ll be right back.”

“You’re leaving.”

“I’m grabbing a blanket. You’re too cold. How long have you been out here?”

He shrugged as she wrapped the first blanket around his shoulders.

“Since you got off work?”

He shrugged again as she draped the other blanket over his head and sat back down next to him.

“Your pants are dirty.” He reached out and sloppily poked at her leg.

She couldn’t stop a small bubble of laughter at that. “Yes they are. It’s slippery up here.”

“You should be more careful.”

A strong gust of wind swept over them. She shivered and hugged her knees closer. Shane put his arm around her shoulder and roughly pulled her under the blankets. The sudden movement combined with his drunken inaccuracy almost knocked her over and she had to grab on to him to keep from falling over.

“Sorry,” he mumbled. “I always fuck everything up.”

“It’s okay. I like when you help me.” She gave him a quick squeeze. “Hey, let’s get going, Shane. It’s cold and wet and my car’s just down the way.”

“Not done yet.” He shook his head.

“Okay, what are you doing up here then?”

“I come up here most nights.”

“Yeah?”

He shrugged and looked out into the distance.

“I think about jumping a lot.” He whispered.

“What?” Bile rose in her throat and her head snapped to look at him.

“I just...sit out here. Looking at the water. It’s high enough here it should work.”

Not knowing what else to do, Anna simply held him and waited. She squeezed her eyes shut and tried to keep her breathing steady.

“I just - Fuck. What am I even doing? Nothing I do matters. I’m just this insignificant stain on the planet. It would be better for everyone if I wasn’t here. No one would miss me.” Once he got started the words started tumbling out, louder and louder, as he continued to stare at nothing.

“I’d miss you.” She offered as she hugged him tightly.

“You’d be fine,” He scoffed softly. “We’ve known each other for, what, a month? You’d get over it.”

“Shane-”

“No, it’s true. That’s fine though. It’s good.” He sighed. “Don’t worry, I’m too much of a pussy to go through with it anyway. I tried to drink enough to be able not care anymore but I’m still too scared. I can’t even get this right. Maybe someday I’ll find the courage...”

“Please don’t.” She whispered.

“Why? What’s the point? Why should I even go on? Give me one reason why I shouldn’t roll off this cliff right now!”

“Okay, well...What would happen to Jas? She needs you, Shane. You’re like a father to her and I know that little girl thinks the world of you.”

“Oh, _fuck_ , Jas! Ugh, I’m so fucking selfish…” His whole frame shook as he dissolved into tears. “Yoba, what the fuck am I doing?”

He fell into her lap and wrapped his arms around her waist as sobs wracked his body. Anna rubbed small circles on his back while her mind raced for anything she could say to calm him down. She had never felt so helpless in her life and it felt like every time she opened her mouth she just made things worse. Eventually he quieted down on his own and sat up, rubbing his eyes

“Anna?”

“Yeah?”

“I think you should take me to the hospital now.”

  



	16. Everything’s fine

“You're pretty.” Shane was slumped in the passenger seat, the left side of his face plastered to the headrest as he stared at Anna.

“That so?” Anna replied, only half paying attention. Her knuckles were white from the tight grasp on the steering wheel and her heart wouldn't stop racing as she navigated the backroad back into town. Her phone was definitely fucked; it was waterlogged and the screen had cracked at some point that night. She desperately hoped there would be some way to get the doctor's attention once they reached the clinic and idly wondered how hard it would really be to scale the wall to the window of the second story apartment where the doctor presumably slept.

“Yeah. Every time I see you I think how pretty you are.” He reached out to pat her head and missed, getting her shoulder instead. He hit his target on the second try and let his hand rest there. “Hey, hey, do you think I’m pretty?”

Anna let out a bark of laughter before she could stop it.

“Yes, Shane, I think you’re very pretty.” She risked a quick glance and saw Shane looking at her with a dopey smile. She rolled her eyes and gave him a quick smile before returning her attention to the road.

As they pulled into town he softly tugged on a lock of her hair.

“Hey, do you wanna go out on a date with me?”

_Perfect timing here buddy…_

“I’ll make you a deal.” Anna sighed resignedly. “Ask me when you’re sober and I promise you I will say yes, ok?”

“I can do that. I'll do it tomorrow.”  his hand fell to her neck and his thumb began softly rubbing circles on the skin there.

_You are really not making this easy for me._

“Good, because I really want you to.” She whispered under her breath as they pulled in front of the clinic. Then louder - “Ok, here we are.”

“You say ‘Ok’ a lot.”

Anna ignored that last statement and undid her seatbelt. “Wait there and I’ll come around and help you out.”

She hurried around to the other side of the car. Shane had already gotten his door open but was struggling with his own seatbelt.

She reached around him and pushed the release button. He took the opportunity to fold himself over her in an awkward embrace.

“You smell good.”

“I guarantee I smell like shit right now.” Anna huffed. “C’mon Casanova, let's get going.”

She wrapped her arms around his chest and began guiding him out of the vehicle. Once his feet were on solid ground he wobbled for a moment before collapsing to the street.

“My legs aren't working right.” He muttered and leaned back against the car.

“Yeah, I was wondering if something like this would happen.” Anna frowned. “Ok, I'm gonna need you to lean forward a little so I can get this door closed again. Yoba knows all we need right now is a stiff wind to come by and cut you in half.”

“I don't think that kind of thing happens in real life.” Still, he obediently leaned over and Anna quickly slammed the door shut behind him. “Oh I should _not_ have done that.”

That was the only warning she got before he started dry heaving. Loudly. Almost immediately the light in the window above the clinic turn on. As well as the lights above Pierre’s store, she noted with a grimace.

_Well that's one way to get his attention._

The window above the clinic opened and a middle aged man with disheveled brown hair (and mustache) stuck his head out to look around.

“Are you the doctor?” Anna shouted up to him. “We need your help!”

“I'll be right down!” The man called down and disappeared from sight. Moments later he rushed out the front door, still in his flannel pajamas.

“What happened?” He demanded as knelt down next to Shane and reached out to check his pulse.

“When I found him he was passed out. There were a lot of empty containers around him. I'm not sure how much was from tonight but I think he's had way too much. He's been awake for about half an hour or so now. And he's cold. I don't know if that's just from being outside though.” She ran through everything she could think of that might be pertinent as quickly as she could.

“All right, let's get him inside.” He turned briefly to make eye contact with her. “Get on his other side and help me get him up.”

Nodding, Anna put her shoulder under Shane’s armpit and together they walked him inside.

“Down the hall, first door on the right.”The doctor continued issuing directions in a calm yet firm manner.

As they were settling Shane into the bed, she heard the door open behind them.

“Ah, Maru, good. Take over for the young lady here please.”

“Right away Doctor Harvey.” The woman gently inserted herself between Anna and Shane. “I’ve got it from here. We’re going to need you to go wait in the lobby now.”

“Yeah, right. Of course.” Anna got out of the way and backed out of the room as the pair set to work.

Once in the waiting room she collapsed into a corner chair and rested her cheek against the cool wall. Everything came rushing into her at once. The fear, the panic, the helplessness. A heavy numbness started in her chest, radiating towards her limbs. Tears fell freely and she bit down on her lip as she tried to keep her breathing steady.

_Everything's fine. Everything's fine. Everything's fine._

“Miss Anna?”

A small hand on her arm jolted Anna from her internal mantra. Jas looked up at her with wide eyes and tears that threatened to spill over at any moment.  

“Oh, hey sweetheart.” She hurriedly wiped at her face. “Everything’s fine. How -?”

“It’s a small town, dear. News travels fast, particularly when it happens within earshot of Caroline.” Marnie sat down next to her and put a couple tissues in her hand.

_How many damn people are in this vill age?_

Anna tried to smile gratefully as she cleaned off her face but barely managed a grimace.

“Jas, honey, can please you go grab that tissue box off the counter for Miss Anna?” Marnie motioned to the receptionist desk on the far side of the room.

“I know, I know,” Jas frowned. “I’ll go wait over there until the grownup talk is done.”

“You are too smart for your own good but thank you.” Marnie kissed her on the top of her head.

“I’m pretty sure he just had way too much to drink.” Anna whispered once the little girl was out of earshot. She waved a hand toward the hallway. “They’re doing doctor stuff or whatever right now. I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

_Everything's fine._

“I’m sure it will, dear.” Marnie took the crumpled tissue out of Anna’s hands and began dabbing at her face. “You’re still crying a bit there, let me help. I can’t thank you enough for all of your help tonight. Now, excuse my language, but you look like you’ve been to hell and back since last I saw you. I want you to head straight home and try to get some rest, I’ll give you a call once we know anything else.”

“Phone’s broken.” Her voice cracked and a new wave of tears began falling.

“Shh, dear, it’s okay.” Marnie wrapped her arms around Anna and squeezed tightly.

“Why are you comforting me right now, it should be the other way around.” It was always a strange sensation to laugh and cry at the same time. “I don’t even care about that stupid phone, I don't know what's wrong with me.”

“You and I both know the phone’s not the worry here,” Marnie whispered as she slowly began rocking the other woman. “You’re exhausted right now but I promise everything’s going to work out. Shane’s in good hands. Harvey really is very good at his job. Go home and we’ll talk soon once we’ve both had some time to calm down a bit.”

“Right. I know you’re right.” Anna sniffled as she sat up. “Oh, Yoba, I’ve ruined your bathrobe!”

“A little mud never hurt anybody, don't you worry. I promise everything will be better once you've had a nap and a good bath.” She helped Anna stand and walked with her to the exit.

Anna drove home in a numb daze. She stripped the dirty clothes off as she stumbled  to the bedroom, dropping each piece to the ground as she went. She climbed into bed, and pulled the comforter over herself and the sleeping dog that had already curled up next to her. She was asleep before her head hit the pillow.

_Everything's fine._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These past couple chapters have been absolutely exhausting to write. I don’t know about the rest of you, but I’m ready to hop on the next train to Fluffsville and never look back. :)


	17. First Step

There were two grumpy chickens for Anna to contend with the following morning.

“Sorry ladies, I promise we’ll have cuddle time soon.” She murmured as she spread out the feed for the day and propped the door open so they could at least enjoy the sunny day. “Hopefully I’ll be back before too long.”

Her first stop was the clinic, where she learned that Shane had already been released earlier that morning. The next was to retrieve the discarded blankets and clothing from the night before. She then spent some time cleaning up all the empty containers littered everywhere.

It was almost noon before Anna got back home. Her car reeked of stale vomit and alcohol so she rolled all the windows down to try to let it air out and resigned herself to walking the next couple days.  She hung the blankets outside to dry and put the soiled hoodies in the washer with an extra scoop of laundry detergent to be safe. While the laundry ran she got in some quality chicken and puppy time; even Maestro was vying for her attention. Both chickens snuggled into her lap and Tara settled in next to them, stretched out next to Anna's thigh.

Early afternoon she walked down the southern dirt path with Shane’s now clean hoodie in hand. The thing was clearly well-loved and she hoped it would at least be a small comfort for him to have it back. Plus there was the added benefit of hopefully seeing with her own eyes that he was indeed all right.

Marnie cracked the door open slightly when Anna knocked. She quickly opened the door wider and ushered her inside.

“Sorry, dear, there've been a couple nosy visitors today.” Marnie whispered with a frown. “Looking for the day’s gossip, no doubt.”

“One of the few downsides to small town living, I think. You’d think people would at least have the common decency to wait a day.” Anna commiserated softly. “Well, I won’t take much of your time, I just wanted to check in on how you were all doing and drop off Shane’s jacket.”

“Oh, bless your heart. Shane’s been resting all day but he’s doing much better. I know he’ll appreciate that you came by, even if he’ll have trouble showing it. And Jas is sleeping right now too. She spent the morning playing the dutiful nurse - Shane’s more bandaids than skin right now because of her.” Marnie chuckled lightly as she took the proffered hoodie and set it on the kitchen table. The large bags under eyes and unkempt hair indicated she herself had not gotten any rest since the last time Anna saw her.

“You’ve had to be strong for everyone, myself included. Is there anything I can do, Marnie? You look about ready to fall over.” Anna asked.

Marnie sat down at the table and rested her head wearily in her hands. “I must look a fright, I know. I just haven’t quite calmed down from all the excitement yet, it would seem.”

Anna sat down next to her and tentatively touched Marnie’s shoulder. “Let me help.”

“Well, there is one thing… Yoba this is embarrassing.” The older woman sighed. “Today is usually grocery day but I haven't the energy to face the outside world today. We wouldn't need much, maybe just some bread and a few soups to get through the next couple days.”

“On it!” Anna smiled. She hopped up and headed to the door, pretending she couldn't see Marnie reaching for her purse. “I'll be back before you know it!”

The trip to Pierre’s was only slightly awkward. The man clearly had questions but also the good sense not to pry. After his first halting attempt to ask how her night had been, he got the hint and retreated back behind the counter. Anna grabbed a couple bags of freeze dried soup, a loaf of bread and, after a moment's hesitation, several ready-to-bake family dinners and a few frozen pizzas.

She was passing one of the last houses on the way out of town when she saw a familiar figure on the road. It looked like he was trying - and failing repeatedly - to do some kind of trick on his skateboard.

“Anna! Hey!” Sam perked up and jogged over when he spotted her.

“Sam, umm, hi,” She stammered. “Hey, uh, sorry about, you know…”

“Ditching me the only other time we’ve ever talked to each other?” He grinned.

“Yeah, that. I’m not great at first impressions, I guess.” She focused her attention on shifting the grocery bags into her other hand.

“It’s all good,” Sam waved his hand dismissively. “I know I can come off strong. Seb’s always telling me I need to chill.”

“Oh, ok. Well still, sorry.” Anna gave him a small smile. “I should really get going though - I’ll see you around?”

“Hey, wait up a sec,” He kept in step with her when she tried to walk away.

“Yeah?” She stopped and tried to keep the frustrated sigh from escaping.

“Is Shane doing ok?” He stepped closer and half whispered the question.

_Oh, for the love of Yoba!_

“I hardly see how that’s any of your business.” She whispered crossly. “No one gave a fuck about him until now there’s something juicy to gossip about! Don’t pretend you suddenly give a shit about him now.”

“Hey, hey, it’s not like that.” Sam raised his hands in defense. “Look, I probably should have asked that better. I know my mom’s been on the phone all day with the regulars trying to figure out what the hell happened.”

His shoulders slumped and he shoved his hands into his front pockets. Sighing, he kicked at random rock near his feet.

“I mean, I know I’m not super close with him but I do work with the guy. We’ve got the kind of bond that only comes from being elbow deep in a box of mac n cheese with another man, y’know?” He glanced up to see if his quip had any effect.

“And?” Anna quirked an eyebrow and waited expectantly.

“I don’t need to know what happened or any details or anything. Just, is he ok? That’s all. I won’t say anything to anyone. I promise. I really am worried about him.”

_Fucking puppy dog eyes…_

“He’s ok.” She sighed in defeat. “Just, please don’t encourage the rumor mill.”

“My lips are sealed.” Sam grinned and lightly punched her shoulder. “Thanks, Anna. Really. See you around?”

“Yeah,” she nodded goodbye and hurriedly continued back down the road. She glanced back once and Sam was already back on his skateboard.

_That would really work better for him if the street wasn’t cobblestone._

When she arrived back at the ranch, the kitchen was empty.  Anna found some money next to a note on the table.

**Went to have a quick lie down. Just put the groceries on the counter and take whatever I owe you. Thanks again! ~M**

She scribbled a quick note underneath Marnie’s -

 **Glad to help. You don't owe me a thing!** **:) Anna**

She set the bags on the counter and began unloading the food. She was elbow deep in the freezer, rearranging the stuff in there to fit the new additions, when she heard someone clear their throat behind her.

“What are you doing and why are you doing it in the freezer?”

Anna jumped in surprise and hit the back of her head on the freezer door. The slight pain was immediately forgotten when she turned around. Shane stood a few feet behind her, his face halfway between an amused smirk and an annoyed frown. He was wearing sweatpants and an old gridball shirt, and just as Marnie had promised, his arms and forehead were covered in little pink bandaids.

“Shi-ane!”

He grunted from the impact as she tumbled into him, wrapped her arms around his torso and buried her face in his chest. He paused awkwardly for a moment before returning the embrace.

“Sorry,” he mumbled into her hair.

“I’m just glad your still here,” she squeezed him a little tighter.

“How bad was it? I don’t really remember what happened last night.”

“It was pretty bad,” she gave him one more quick hug before letting him go and wiping at her face roughly with her sleeve. She turned back to put away the frozen foods and nodded towards the kitchen table. “And for your information, I was dropping off your hoodie and helping Marnie, thank you very much.”

“Oh thank Yoba!” He scooped up the hoodie and hastily put it on before sitting down. “You cleaned it?”

“Fuck yes I cleaned it. That thing was covered in mud and vomit and Yoba knows what else.” She leaned against the counter and smirked. “I figured you wouldn’t mind if I took care of that.”

“Sorry,” Shane grimaced. “Harvey said you were the one who found me? He, uh, also gave me a number for a therapist in Zuzu City.”

“Yeah? Are you gonna call them?”

“I think so, yeah.” He swallowed thickly. “It’s worth a try at least right?”

“I think so, yeah. Definitely worth a try.” She grinned and crossed the room to give him another hug.

“Yeah, yeah.” He cleared his throat roughly. “Now get out of here unless you wanna see a grown ass man cry.”

She tried to move away but he held her there a second longer to whisper, “Thanks.”

“Anytime.”

  
  



	18. Moving Forward

It was early Friday evening and Anna sat on the steps of her porch, reading the instructions for her newly delivered incubator. It seemed simple enough but was still somehow terrifying. Hypothetically the machine would take care of all the humidity and temperature control on its own but she had the feeling she’d be checking the damn thing constantly for at least the first few weeks that she was using it.

Tara’s bark and the sound of footsteps on the freshly laid gravel path announced Shane’s arrival. He was carrying a plastic jug and a small paper bag. Tara ran over to him and followed closely at his heels, tail wagging in a blur. She only bumped her face into the back of his leg a couple times as they approached the cabin.

“Hey,” Anna smiled and stood up, folding up the instruction sheet and tucking it into her back pocket.

Shane looked better, not that that was a difficult bar to cross. The bags that were always under his eyes were still there but his eyes themselves seemed clearer than they had in a long time.

“Hey,” He grunted. “Got a delivery for you. Milk and cheese.”

“I'm pretty sure I didn't order anything?” She questioned as she held the front door open for him.

“Yeah,” He brushed past her and set the items on the counter in the kitchen, then bent down and scratched Tara’s ears.  “Marnie told me to tell you ‘Two can play this game’ before she sent me over. I'm pretty sure you'll be getting free shit for the foreseeable future. Also can I hide here for a while?”

“Yeah, of course,” She watched him immediately cross the room and collapse face first into the loveseat in the small living room. Tara quickly jumped up after him and curled up on his lower back. “Um, how long is a while? Because I don’t think Tara’s moving any time soon.”

“Just kick me out when you're sick of me.” His reply was muffled by the throw pillow he was laying on.

_Guess you're staying forever then. Was that creepy? Oh Yoba I'm turning into a creeper..._

“Hey, will you eat some pizza if I pop one in?” She put the milk and cheese away, and then opened the freezer to grab a pizza and maybe cool the blush off her face a bit.

“If I ever say no to pizza, just take me out back and end it.”

“Seems a bit extreme.” She chuckled. “First step should be tying you up and shoving pizza in your face until you remember who you are.”

“Kinky.”

“Perv.”

Once the pizza was in the oven Anna joined Shane in the living room. She sat cross legged on the floor near his torso and leaned back against the couch.

“Has Gus or Em said anything?” He asked as she settled in.

“I don't know, actually. I haven't been by the saloon at all this week.”

“Why not?”

“Well, there wasn't much point if you weren't gonna be there.” She shifted uncomfortably at the admission.

“If anyone bothers you Gus would kick their ass. You don't need me there.” Shane shifted onto his elbows to make sure she saw his eyeroll.

_Yoba, he's gonna make me say it out loud._

“That's not what I meant, you dork,” She snatched the pillow from underneath him and lightly swatted his shoulder with it. “I only went to the bar in the first place to hang out with you.”

“Oh. Well. Um.” He grabbed the pillow back and laid down again. After a few moments of silence he asked, “So what do we do if it’s not going to the bar?”

“And here’s the part where you find out how boring I am.” Anna sighed. “I don’t really _do_ anything. It’s pretty much chickens and video games.”

“Right, because I was thinking of taking up mountain climbing.” He snorted. “I’ll start bringing the pizza then and that sounds like a damned good night to me.”

“Me too.” Anna reached up to pet the slumbering pup still on his back. “So, umm, how are you doing?”

“Fine,” He continued speaking while face first in the pillow. “My head fucking hurts and I can’t go five minutes without someone asking me how I’m doing.”

Anna grimaced. “Sorry.”

“I don’t get mad when you ask, for some reason.” He shifted slightly to frown at her. “That was your one free pass though.”

“Hey, I’ll take what I can get.” She grinned back.

He smiled slightly before he could stop himself but quickly reverted back to a more neutral expression. He leaned his head into his hand and stared at the floor for a few minutes before speaking.

“I've got my first session tomorrow.”

“Yeah?” Anna glanced over at him, but when she saw him looking away, she did too.

“It's just a meeting each other thing I think. Let the doc know how much of a fucked up situation they've got to fix or whatever.” He shrugged. “Shitty part is it gives Lewis one more thing to hang over my head.”

“What do you mean?” Anna frowned and turned back towards him.

“I'm borrowing his truck to get to the city. Whenever he does me a favor it always feels like he's trying to buy my silence or something.”

“Oookay. I feel like I’m missing a vital piece of information here. Wanna back up a little there?”

“You know Marnie and Lewis are seeing each other?”

“Well, I kinda figured. They’ve always been glued at the hip when’re I’ve seen them down at the bar.”

“Yeah, well, he somehow thinks it’s a secret and wants to keep it that way. Says it would ‘undermine his authority’ or some bullshit. And since I see him coming to the ranch late at night and leaving early in the morning, he’s decided he needs to pay me off and keep me quiet or whatever. Usually he just buys me a beer or two and kinda…I dunno, winks at me?”

“Okay but that makes no sense.” Anna rubbed at her temples as she tried to put the pieces of what she’d just learned together. “Everyone knows already.”

“Yup.”

“But he doesn’t think people know.”

“Yup.”

“And he doesn’t _want_ people to know.”

“Yup.”

“Because he's the mayor?”

“Yup.”

“And Marnie’s okay with this?”

“Nope.”

“The fuck is his problem?” She could already feel her hackles raising in defense of her new friend. “Marnie’s a goddamned sweetheart!”

“She deserves better.” He quietly agreed. “Don't tell her I said anything though. I probably should have kept my damn mouth shut.”

“I won't.” She assured him with a frustrated sigh.

The oven timer dinged and Anna hopped up to retrieve dinner. Shane grunted slightly as Tara leaped off his back to follow. Comfy sleeping places were great, but nothing could compete with the chance of dropped food.

Anna returned with the pizza balanced in one hand as she dragged a small end table in front of the couch.

“I could have gotten up.” Shane grumbled. He sat up as she set the pizza down in front of him.

“This is usually where I eat anyway.” She waved her hand dismissively. “Kitchen table’s so formal.”

He grunted in agreement as they both grabbed a slice.

“You know,” Anna said as she sat down next to him. “I was actually planning on running a couple errands in the city tomorrow if you want to get out from underneath the mayor’s thumb…”

“What kind of errands?” Shane’s eyes narrowed as he tried to determine the truth of her statement. Tara waited at his feet, head darting between the two as she listened intently for the sound of falling pizza.

“Well mostly I need to get a new phone. And then I figured as long as I was in the area I'd grab some paint. I've been wanting to paint the coop. Maybe even do a mural or something on it.”

“Robin sells paint.” He challenged.

“Yeah but she's soooo _expensive_.” Anna whined. “If you’re not too picky on the color, you can get discount returned paint for super cheap at the big hardware stores.”

“Holy crap you are such a cheapskate!” He snorted and shook with barely contained laughter. A small bit of pepperoni fell off his pizza slice and Tara immediately began sniffing along the ground until she found her prize.

“Seriously, I can get like ten gallons for the price of one! That’s just good business sense!” She defended.

“Yeah, yeah.” He sighed in defeat. “Okay.”

“Okay?” She looked at him hopefully.

“Yeah. But I’m paying for the gas.”

“Fine.” She conceded. “Can we stop for ice cream on the way home?”

“You’re the one driving.”

“We’re stopping for ice cream on the way home. Also, I promise not to nag you on the way back either.”

“Thanks.” He gave her a small grateful smile.

“Mm-hmm.” She paused. “Full disclosure?”

His smile disappeared and he looked at her shrewdly.

“Even if I hadn’t already planned on going on my own. And even if it didn’t mean a passive aggressive jab at Lewis, who I’ve taken a sudden inexplicable dislike of...the offer would still stand.”

“I figured.” He grew quiet and frowned at the floor. “Why do you do that?”

“Do what?”

“Treat me like a person.”

“Hey,” She nudged his shoulder and waited for him to look up. “Not only are you a person, you happen to be my favorite person.”

His eyes returned to the floor and his nostrils flared slightly as he took a couple deep breaths through his nose. Suddenly his arm shot out and he pulled Anna into a tight embrace. She hesitantly wrapped her arms around his waist and pressed her face into his chest. His heart was thudding loudly as he squeezed her closer and p rested his chin on the top of her head. She closed her eyes and began to rub small soothing circles on the small of his back as he fought to regain his composure.

“I don’t know what you see in me,” He whispered into her hair. “But I’m glad you do.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	19. Saturday Morning

Anna forced herself out of bed at her alarm’s first ring. Normally she'd hit the snooze once or twice until Tara got tired of the waiting for breakfast and barked her awake. But today the anxiety from the thought of running behind and disappointing Shane meant that as soon as she opened her eyes, her elevated heart rate rendered the snooze button moot anyway. She prided herself on her punctuality and today of all days was not the day to start running late.

She had realized belatedly last night after Shane left that they hadn't actually discussed when his appointment was. She needed to make sure the day’s chores were done before he showed up. Even if that meant she had hours to wait after her work was done. That just meant there would be time to calm back down, so win win.

She opened the front door to let Tara out before grabbing a quick shower and scarfing down a granola bar. Her morning cigarette was lit before she had even settled herself on the front step. Yes, she was in a hurry, but some things couldn't be sacrificed. Plus, this was a good opportunity to go through her mental checklist of do’s and don’t’s for the trip. This wasn’t something she had to do often but this felt like her first opportunity to prove to Shane that she could be a good friend, and could be what he needed instead of what she wanted.

Not that she even really knew what she wanted at this point.

_Okay, Hand One…_

He made her laugh, which was attractive. He made her feel safe, also attractive.

_Hand Two…._

But did that mean she was just using him as a crutch

_Whatever, feeling safe isn’t a bad thing. Back to the first hand..._

The little she’d seen of his interactions with Jas had endeared him even more to her. He had a good heart, which was attractive. His sarcasm - attractive. His scruff - attractive. The butterflies that immediately appeared in her stomach whenever they made eye contact - overwhelming.

_Okay, fine, he’s super fucking hot, okay?_

His drunken confession from the other night wasn’t helping, either.

_He thinks I’m pretty. Not that he even remembers telling me that. Or how he asked me out. Which brings us back to that stupid second hand..._

Clearly this was not the time to pursue anything romantic.

_Right, because otherwise you’d totally take the initiative and ask him out. Sweep him right off his feet. As if that’s something you’ve ever done in your life before. Ever._

Besides that obvious hindrance, the last thing Shane needed right now was the added stress of some starry-eyed girl fawning after him. And just because he had said some sappy stuff when he was drunk _(like suuuuper drunk)_ didn’t mean he thought the same things when he was sober. Drunk often coupled quite well with horny, after all.

_First hand. Or maybe this is the second hand still…. Both Hands…?_

Knowing what she did now about how deep his internal struggles were was a little scary. But it also made all his traits from the first hand even more impressive. He was so much stronger than he gave himself credit for.

Still, more than anything, what he definitely needed right now was a friend. And so did she.

_Well that was a lot of thinking without much figuring shit out._ Anna  sighed and let the long burnt out cigarette fall from her fingers.

Glancing around as she stood up and stretched, she noticed Tara was standing at the gate to the chicken coop. The dog was fixated on the door to the coop, tail wagging furiously.

“Tara! Come here, baby!” She called as she descended the few steps to the ground.

Tara obediently ran over, tail still going a hundred miles a minute, and sat in front of Anna. When Anna reached down to pet her, Tara pounced towards Anna's feet with a soft bark and took off towards the coop again. Once in front of the gate she gave another expectant bark and put her front paws on the fence as she leaned in as far as she could into the enclosure.

“What's got you so worked up?” She wondered as she jogged over and opened the gate.

Tara darted between her legs to the coop door and barked again. She pawed at the door and turned back towards Anna with an excited hop. Anna cracked open the door and stuck her head in curiously as Tara once again slipped past her.

In the far corner, Shane was half slumped against the wall. His eyes were closed and his soft snores reverberated through the small room. Raisin and Maestro slept, cuddled together, in his lap. A third chicken lay on his chest with its head resting on his shoulder.

Tara ran to the unfamiliar hen and unceremoniously shoved her nose into it's fluffy body.

“Tara, no!” Anna whispered sharply. “Come here!”

As expected, this particular command went ignored. If anything, Tara’s tail began wagging impossibly faster as she put her front paws on Shane's chest for better access to the new chicken. In response the poor animal let out a disgruntled squawk and quickly climbed to safety atop Shane's head.

Which only made the whole experience that much more exhilarating. Tara barked again, much louder this time, as she used the sleeping man beneath her as a boosting board to follow the chicken.

“What the fuck?” Shane jolted awake and he pushed Tara away with a clumsy swipe of his arm. Raisin and Maestro scattered to the other side of the coop and the third chicken flapped its wings a few times as it tried to maintain balance on top of Shane's head.

This was the best day ever, as far as Tara was concerned. She barked once more and readied herself for a leap back towards Shane.

“Tara, no!” Anna rushed over and held the dog back. An immediate struggle began over whether or not jumping was currently allowed. “Shit. Shane, I am so sorry!”

Anna dragged the squirming dog out of the coop and quickly shut the door before Tara could rush back in. Ignoring the frantic scratching and whining coming from the other side of the door, she turned back to see Shane had stood up and gotten the chicken off his head. He held the animal close to his chest, slowly petting its back while he murmured reassuringly in its ear.

“All right, then.” She leaned back against the door as a small smirk began to form on her lips. “What are doing and why are you doing it in my coop?”

“Oh, shit...yeah,” He shifted the chicken under one of his arms so he could rub the back of his neck with a free hand as he glanced at her sheepishly.  “I was having trouble falling asleep so I went for a walk. I guess I kinda ended up in here. I really didn’t mean to still be here so late. Or early? Just was looking for somewhere to think. Definitely did _not_ mean to fall asleep. Sorry.”

“It’s ok. Like I said before, you’re always welcome here. And I meant it.” Anna smiled reassuringly. “Nervous for today?”

“I guess so, yeah,” He cleared his throat and returned his attention back to the chicken resting under his arm.

“Who’s this?” Anna asked as she moved next to him.

Shane took the chicken into both his hands again and held it out a bit towards Anna. She scratched at the hens head and smiled softly as she heard content clucking.

“This is Charlie. She’s been kinda mad at me for ignoring her lately so I brought her along for the walk.”

“Hi Charlie,” Anna murmured. “It’s very nice to meet you.”

They stayed like that for a few moments before Shane coughed again.

“Yeah, So,I should probably get her home. And wash off the chicken smell. Plus Marnie’s probably freaking out right now.”

“Yeah, probably.” She grimaced. “So, when do we need to leave for ZuZu?

“Couple hours is fine. I’ll swing back in a little bit?”

“Works for me.”

They both moved to exit the coop. As soon as the door opened Tara rushed back towards Shane to resume her quest of making a new chicken friend.

“Later, I promise.” Shane chuckled as he stepped past the eager dog.  He gave one last wave before heading down the path towards his home

Anna watched him walk away until he disappeared into the forest.

_Okay, rule number one: Don’t fuck this up._

  



	20. Road Trip

“What's your favorite color?”

“Whu- uh, purple? I guess.” Shane glanced over at Anna with a slightly annoyed frown.

The closer they got to ZuZu City, the comfortable silence they had been traveling in had quickly grown more and more tense. As they started to near the city limits and the farmland slowly gave way to overgrown fields with a few random billboards, Shane began drumming his fingers on the car door as he stared blankly out the window. While Anna certainly wasn't one for small talk, desperate times called for desperate measures.  

“Hmmm. Brown’s mine.”

And they were back to mostly silence except for the soft drumming if his fingers. After a few more miles ticked away, Shane snorted softly.

“Who the hell has brown as their favorite color?” He mumbled.

“Hey, it's a perfectly valid choice! It reminds me of the way dirt smells when it's just started raining. Or a hot cup of coffee when it's cold outside and the windows are all frosted over. It's a very calming color.”

“It’s also the color of shit.”

“True.” Anna giggled before she could help herself. “Usually, at least.”

“Seriously? Gross.” But a small smile was threatening to form on his lips.

“You took it there first. Not my fault. I was being all poetical and shit.” She grinned in response. “What's your last name?”

“What? Why?” He looked at her cautiously.

“I dunno. Just seems kinda weird that I don't know it.” She shrugged. “Mine's Stevens.”

“Fine. It's Harper.”  He grunted and went back to staring out the window. They passed a green sign that read ‘ZuZu City Next 5 Exits.’ The drumming intensified.

“So, what do -” Anna began.

The drumming stopped.

“Look. I know what you're trying to do.” Shane interjected roughly. He paused and took a deep breath before continuing. “And I appreciate it. Really. But this is just making it worse. We both hate small talk bullshit so can we just...not?”

“Yeah. Okay.” She nodded and, honestly, felt kind of relieved at not having to think of more questions. She was pretty shit at it anyways. “I just wish there was something I could do to help.”

“You already are. A lot, I promise. My shit’s just too fucked for normal people to fix. That's why we're here in the first place, right?” He smiled ruefully as he once again returned his attention to the landscape rushing by.

A hundred protests tumbled through her mind but she kept her mouth shut. He wouldn't really believe anything she said anyways. It wouldn't help.

They approached their exit and Anna tensed as she turned and steeled herself to merge into the busy city.

“Yoba, I hate these damn zipper merge things.” She muttered to herself as she quickly dashed into a brief opening in the heavier traffic.

Once they were safely traveling with the flow, Anna breathed a sigh of relief. Her hand immediately darted towards her purse for her pack of cigarettes before she stopped herself. _No smoking when you've got company stuck in close quarters with you, that's rude. Deal with it until you're outside._ Now it was her turn to start drumming her fingers.

“You handled that fine; why do you hate them?” Shane asked curiously.

“Just do. What if next time no one lets me in? I mean, I've never messed up a roundabout but I hate those too.”

“Huh.” Shane was quiet for a moment before smiling conspiratorially. “What else do you hate?”

“Oh Yoba, how long have you got?” She sighed dramatically. “Parallel parking. One way streets. Road construction. When the traffic lights are out and it just turns into a free for all. People who drive in the wrong direction in parking lots. Those jerks who don't turn on their lights when it's foggy out. The assholes who ride your ass when you're already going faster than the speed limit.”

Anna paused to take a deep breath before continuing her rant. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Shane staring at her, slackjawed.

“What?” She immediately challenged.

“Nothing, nothing.” He raised his hands in defense and chuckled slightly. “You know, I don't think I've ever seen you so worked up before, is all. Guess it's a good thing you live in the country now.”

“Like that's any better. I'm always terrified the dirt roads are gonna pop my tires. And so many of the roads are barely wide enough for one car. And what if an animal jumps out in front of me?” She sighed in defeat. “I guess driving just makes me angry.”

After a couple minutes of frowning, she perked up a little. “At least everything back home is in walking distance. I'm sorry, this is a really petty thing to complain about.”

“Are you kidding?” Shane grinned back at her. “You just went on a rant for, like, ten minutes straight. That was amazing!”

“That was hardly ten minutes.” Anna rolled her eyes and smiled sheepishly back. “Felt good though.”

“Seriously, anytime you want to bitch, let me know. I wanna come and watch.”

“Now who's the kinky one?” She smirked.

“Ooh, bonus points if you tie me up and shove pizza in my face **_while_ ** you're raging!” He waggled his eyebrows at her before bursting into laughter. “Shit, I'm going to end up giving myself some really weird dreams one of these days.”

“If you ever refuse to make eye contact with me, then you'll know that I know. So, you know, keep that in mind when you go sleep.” She teased with a laugh.

“Right back at ya, honey.” He laughed again. Almost immediately he seemed to realize what he had said and a flush began creeping up his neck.

_Honey? Oh Yoba…_

Anna's eyes widened and her face immediately turned bright red as well.

_Why can't I blush slowly like normal people?!_

Thankfully they were now approaching the parking garage across the street from the therapist's office. Anna was soon distracted by the confusing one way signs and narrow driving paths in the maze that was the garage. She muttered angrily to herself about pedestrians and right of ways until she finally found a suitable spot near the top.

“Seriously, any time you drive anywhere, I want to be there.” Shane chuckled as they got out and headed to the nearby elevator.

“Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up pretty boy.” She grumbled. Before they entered the elevator she threw a quick glance at the sign posted to the side of the doors. “Don't forget, we're parked in yellow unicorn.”

“Yellow unicorn, easy enough.” He laughed again and reached over to direct the elevator to the ground floor.

In the short amount of time it took to reach the bottom, Shane’s demeanor had dissolved back into tense silence and he had shoved his hands into his pockets to keep them still. Still, he didn't slow his pace. If anything, he walked a little faster as they stepped out into the sunlight and across the street.

“Let's get this over with,” He muttered to himself. Then he looked over to Anna. “I'll text you when I'm done?”

“Perfect. Umm. Have fun?”

“Right.” He snorted and disappeared into the building.

 

Getting a new phone took much longer than Anna had anticipated. First, there was the 45 minute wait for an open employee, who turned out to be a young college-aged girl named Stacy. Then, Yoba knew how long to convince said employee that Anna just wanted the phone she'd spent the past 45 minutes picking out.

No, she didn't want to add cable to her package.

No, she didn't want the new model that came out last week and was ten times as expensive.

No, she still didn't want to bundle in that cable deal.

No, she didn't want to change her plan.

No, really, stop with the cable!

Once her number was transferred to the new phone, there were several missed calls and text messages.

“Can I check those quick before we finish up? I'm actually expecting to hear from a,” _WHY ARE YOU PAUSING HERE?_ “friend.”

“Sure, no problem!” Stacy cheerfully replied. “I'll just use that time to check quick and see if I can get you a better deal on that cable package!”

Anna bit the inside of her cheek to hold in the exasperated sigh that really wanted out. She opened her messages; almost all of them were from her friend Eliza but sure enough there was one waiting for her from Shane. She hurriedly replied back that she was still at the phone shop and would be out as soon as she could.

“Okay, sorry about that. I'm ready to keep going!” Anna called to the clerk while offering a silent prayer to Yoba that she'd been quick enough.

“Good news!” Stacy chirped happily as she came back to the counter. “It turns out we've got a great deal on cable for our customers who live in your area! How does 50% for the first three months sound?”

“Please, I really don't need anything else.” Anna pleaded. “I just want this phone.”

“Of course! I promise we're almost done here. And if you ever change your mind, we'll be happy to help you out!” Her cheerfulness was never ending.

“You'll be the first to know, Stacy. Thank you.” It was getting harder and harder to maintain a calm facade.

The bell on the store’s front door rang and Anna glanced behind her to see Shane walking towards her.

“Hey, I'm almost done here. Sorry it's taking me so long.” She leaned over to whisper in his ear. “This lady is really pushy and keeps trying to sell me extra shit.”

“I got this.” He whispered back. He put on his best frown and turned to focus his most intimidating glare on the sales clerk.

Stacy was staring back at them with a wide grin.

“Oh, this is great! Fantastic! We actually have a couple's deal going on right now! A second phone and line on the same account is practically free!”

“Yeah, I'm out.” Shane immediately turned around and left the store to wait outside.

“Oh. I, I’m so sorry! I assumed -” Stacy frowned, brightly, somehow.

“It's fine. But, please, can we finish?” Anna knew there was no hiding the bright red of the blush that she could feel heating up her face.

“Yes, right away!” Stacy almost actually looked sorry as she began swiftly clicking through the rest of the screens on the sales tablet. “You two just seemed so comfortable with each other, I thought - Oh man, I'm really sorry. Or hey, maybe this'll jumpstart something!”

“I very much doubt that.” Anna muttered as she signed off on her new phone and hurriedly rushed out the door.

Shane was leaning against the concrete wall of a store a couple doors down. He glanced up when Anna exited and visibly relaxed when he saw it was her, alone and ready to go.

“Home?”  He asked when she got close.

“Home.” She agreed.

  



	21. New Days Dawning

**_Hey. You awake?_ **

**_Please please please wake up_ **

 

**_No. It's Sunday._ **

**_Literally the only day I can sleep in._ **

 

**_I need your help. It's an emergency!_ **

 

**_No it's not. No help till noon._ **

 

**_BABIES SHANE_ **

 

**_Wtf_ **

 

**_SHANE THE CHICKENS ARE HATCHING HELP ME_ **

**_FYI_ **

**_I might be freaking out_ **

 

**_Holy shit woman, calm your tits._ **

**_I gotta put some pants on first._ **

 

**_THESE TITS WILL NEVER BE CALM_ **

 

With shaking hands, Anna switched her phone back over to the webpage she had been studying religiously for the past week.  She had the damn thing memorized but now that the moment was upon her, that knowledge had swiftly left her brain. Now she could only look at the phone blankly; the words on the page couldn't compete with her racing heart.

And that knowledge had basically amounted to ‘leave them alone.’ Still this was all pretty scary the first time. It's easy to forget these things.

She took another peek into the incubator. Two babies had hatched so far and both were chirping insistently. Apparently that noise would encourage the other eggs to hatch? Sounded more like some old wives tale more than science, but they needed time in the heat to dry off before she transferred them anyways. They'd be ready to be moved soon though.

_Shit, the baby bin!_

Anna dashed out of the coop and across the yard to the house. Tara had been napping on the porch but quickly got caught up in the excitement. Her momma was running? That never happened! This was awesome! She ran down the steps and met Anna halfway across the yard, then followed her back the rest of the way. She even had time to fit in some jumps and barks along the way.

The giant plastic tub was waiting in the living room, right where Anna had left it the night before. She had already put a good layer of hay on the bottom so all that was left to do was get it into the coop. The task would only be slightly awkward with the ‘help’ Tara was sure to give.

Back outside, she could see Shane heading up the path between their homes. He was followed by a very excited Jas, who was skipping in excited circles around him as they walked. Anna flashed them a big grin as she headed back to the coop with her own overly excited helper also running circles around her.

“Just make sure Tara stays outside the fence,” Anna called out as she carefully maneuvered herself around said dog and into the chicken yard.

She had just set the tub down near the incubator when the coop door opened slightly and Shane cautiously peeked his head in. Moments later Jas squeezed through the gap to stand just inside the door. Anna locked eyes with Shane and immediately her panic began to subside. His messy hair was a testament to how quickly he had gotten up to come to her rescue and the look on his face could only be described as annoyed amusement. The annoyance disappeared as they looked at each other and was replaced with … resignation? Good enough.

“Miss Anna, can we see the babies?” Jas asked quietly as she she stood up on her tiptoes to try to get a look at the bin across the room. The flower crown on top of her head shifted a little as she struggled to be taller and she brought a hand up to keep it in place.

“Yes. Yes! Please come in!” Anna smiled. “There's two so far but I think I see a couple more getting ready to come out!”

Shane picked Jas up as they crossed the room to get a closer look.

“Oh!”Jas squealed. “They're so cute! Uncle Shane, look! Do you see them?”

“Yeah I do.” A small smile played across his face as he watched the baby chicks bumble around.

“When should we take them out?” Anna asked.

“Depends on who you ask.” He chuckled. “I always get nervous when they start playing soccer with the other eggs so I say sooner than later.”

“But you can leave them in there longer if you want to.” Jas added sagely.

“Oh?” Anna said. “You know a lot about chickens, Jas?”

“Uh-huh!” The little girl’s head bobbed up and down as she emphatically answered. “Uncle Shane's been teaching me all kinds of stuff! I help out with our chickens all the time!”

“Wow, that's awesome!” Anna grinned back. Jas’s enthusiasm was infectious. “Well in that case I'm extra lucky, having two chicken experts helping me!”

“Uh-huh!” Jas agreed. “And we can help you anytime you need us! Uncle Shane is really smart!”

“Okay, okay,” Shane frowned from the attention and cleared his throat. “We've got work to do. Enough chit chat.”

He bent down to set Jas on the floor. Jas gave him a giggle and quick hug before peeking into the plastic tub in the corner.

“Is this for the babies?” She looked over at Anna.

“Yes ma’am! What do you think?” Anna asked.

“Hmm…” Jas inspected the bin and tapped her chin thoughtfully. “I think it could use a little more hay.”

“It looks fine.” Shane grunted as he peered over her shoulder.

“No,” Jas disagreed and pointed in. “This corner here looks a little low.”

“Jas,” He warned.

“It's ok.” Anna said. “I'll be right back; the bag’s in the living room.”

“I think Uncle Shane should get it. He's really strong.”

“Oh for the love of Yoba,” Shane muttered under his breath. “I'll be right back.”

 

Once he had left the room Jas immediately turned to Anna with a very serious expression.

“Are you and Uncle Shane boyfriend and girlfriend?” She demanded.

Anna gasped in surprise and say down next to her.

“We're very good friends.”

“That's what Uncle Shane said too.” Jas frowned. “But you go on dates to ZuZu city every Saturday! I've been counting. It's been three weeks in a row now! If you're not going on dates then why aren't I allowed to come too? It's not fair!”

“Oh, sweetheart.” Anna paused as she tried to find words that would make sense. “He's just got a doctor he's seeing there.”

“Why doesn't Dr. Harvey help instead?”

“Well, there are different kinds of doctors for different things. Dr. Harvey takes care of people when they get hurt and helps them stay healthy. And the doctor in the city is very good at helping people who are,” She paused again. “well, sad, I guess.”

“Oh.” Jas picked a stray piece of hay from her dress. “I don't want Uncle Shane to be sad anymore. So I guess I can't be mad now.”

“I tell you what. I'll talk to your uncle and see if there's a special trip we can all take together.”

“Really?” Jas perked up. “Can we have a dance party?”

“We'll see,” Anna laughed. “We might have to start smaller than that. I don't think Shane likes dancing very much. What about a chicken party?”

“We're doing that right now!” Jas giggled.

“Hmmm...what about a pizza party?” Anna made a show of thinking very hard.

“What about a pizza chicken dance party?” Jas’s giggles were contagious. The more Jas  laughed, the more Anna laughed. And the more Anna laughed, the more Jas laughed. It was getting pretty ridiculous. Someone may have snorted. It might have been Anna.

“Wait, I've got a better idea!” Anna gasped through her laughter. “What about a tickle party?”

Jas squealed and tried to get up and run, with Anna close behind. They both turned simultaneously and saw Shane leaning against the door. They'd been so distracted that neither had noticed when he slipped back in. The unguarded smile on his face swiftly disappeared when they looked at him, only to just as quickly reappear when Jas launched herself at him to give one of his legs a big hug.

He tried to take a step forward but between the sack in his arms and the added weight to a leg, it was a bit awkward. Anna wiped the happy tears that had formed in her eyes and hurriedly relieved him of the hay. She set the bag down next to the plastic tub.

“You guys looked busy, didn't want to interrupt.” He apologized as he scooped up Jas to ruffle her hair.

“My crown!” Jas shrieked and tried to squirm away. This was made difficult by the giggle fit she was still in the midst of.

“I'll fix it, princess.” Shane chuckled and set her down by the incubator. He squatted down next to her and carefully righted the crown.

“How do I look?” Her dress was covered in hay, plenty of stray hairs had escaped and were standing up every which way, and there was more than dirt smudge on her face.

“Perfect.” Shane chuckled. “Now let's finish getting the tub ready. We need to get the chicks moved.”

“Oh yeah!” Jas reached into the bag and threw a small handful of hay into the bin. “There, it's ready!”

Shane stared at her blankly for a moment before closing his eyes and sighing.

“That looks much better. Thank you, Jas.” Anna smiled and gave Shane a sympathetic pat on his shoulder.

“C’mon, I'll show you how to do this.” Shane got up and carefully transferred the first baby chick into its new home while Anna watched attentively. “Okay, your turn.”

“Right,” Anna took a determined breath and lifted the second baby carefully.

Her hands shook slightly from a mix of nervousness and excitement. Shane wrapped his hands softly around hers and helped her place it in the tub. The chick stumbled out of their hands to go cuddle with its sibling and their hands remained together as they both watched the newly hatched chickens.

“You got this.” He murmured. To himself? To Anna? To the baby chicks?

“Yeah,” Anna agreed and squeezed his hand. And then realized they were, technically, very much holding hands at this point.

_Holy shit_

She held her breath and willed herself to stay perfectly still in an attempt to both prolong and not call attention to the moment.

“Can I name them?” Jas’s asked eagerly, her eyes glued on the babies.

Shane hastily withdrew his hands and shoved them into his pockets as he cleared his throat. “These are Anna's chickens, kiddo.”

“Actually, I wouldn't mind the help.” Anna busied her hands moving a few small bits of hay around. She glanced between the two. “I'm not very good at thinking of names. Did you have any in mind, Jas?”

“Uh-huh!” The girl grinned. “This one is Cake because I love cake! And this one is Pepper because Uncle Shane loves peppers!”

Shane sighed deeply once more but said nothing. He stood up and looked back into the incubator.

“Those are great names,” Anna smiled. “Cake and Pepper it is!”

“You'll probably have a few more within the next day or two.” He said thoughtfully as he looked over the remaining eggs.

“Can we come back tomorrow and see them?” Jas asked her uncle with her best puppy dog eyes.

“I'm not who you should be asking, kiddo.”

“Miss Anna?” Jas turned hopefully to her.

“You both are always welcome here.” Anna confirmed emphatically.

“You still have to go to school first. We'll come back when I get done with work?” He glanced at Anna for approval one more time and smiled slightly when she nodded.

“Yay! I'll think of lots more good names!” Jas clapped her hands excitedly and ran around to Shane. She grabbed his hand and pulled him back to where Anna was sitting. He sat down, and Jas climbed into his lap and snuggled in. “Can we stay a bit longer today though?”

“Yeah,” He murmured as Anna leaned into his side and rested her head on his shoulder. “We can stay a bit longer.”

  



End file.
